The Walrus and Milkshake are the final rejections in Season 8 of The Masked Singer. (Photos: fox)
Sunday was ’90s Night on The Masked Singer, with judge Jenny McCarthy-Wahlberg, who dressed up for the occasion as Tragic Kingdom-era Gwen Stefani; Host Nick Cannon as Bobby “The Crab” Brown, as is his prerogative; and Tag Team, who label each clue pack with a “Whoomp! There it is!” Chorus. We even had Girl Meets World star Danielle Fishel and *NSYNC’s Lance Bass drop by. This made Lance the third *NSYNC member to appear on The Masked Singer, after Joey “The Rabbit” Fatone from season 1 and Chris “The Hummingbird” Kirkpatrick from this season, so now all we need to do is Justin Timberlake and JC Chasez to complete the set and get everything in, um, dubbing.
Yes, the ’90s dream was alive on The Masked Singer, and in general I loved this season’s dream themes – previous episodes have included Andrew Lloyd Webber Night, TV Theme Song Night, and even Muppets Night. But I’ve found Season 8’s new format, which featured an almost instantaneous double elimination in every episode, to be more of a nightmare. (Check out my lengthy tirade about how this format change sucked a lot of fun and excitement out of the show.) This week was no exception, with two mystery singers exposed by the end of the hour-long episode. All the judges complained that this was an episode where all three contestants really deserved to stay, and angry fans on Twitter seemed to agree. But the ’90s dream has sadly been shattered for both the Walrus and the Milkshake.
Jenny actually thought the walrus who put his own spin on the 1992 Spin Doctors hit “Two Princes” was the aforementioned JC Chasez, while her fellow judges suspected the tusked, slightly husky warbler might be another heartthrob Joseph Gordon -Levitt, John Stamos, Mark-Paul Gosselaar, Mario Lopez or Scott Wolff. But only Robin Thicke found out that Blossom sitcom star Joey Lawrence was the walrus. (Goo goo g’joob. Sorry, couldn’t resist.)
The story goes on
“I’ve seen all the different shows you’ve gone through in your career and I remember when you released a song I was like, ‘Wow, I want to have a video and my song [be like that]’Cause we looked a little alike,” Robin confessed to a very flattered Joey. Jenny was a newly converted Joey fan and exclaimed, “Where are your albums? You need albums! You need tons of albums!” – to which Joey replied that he actually plans to get back into music. “You should, man; you sounded great,” said Robin. So Joey could flourish again… but it was all over for the walrus.
The milkshake didn’t bring all the jurors or studio audience voters to court, either (sorry, again – this time for the mid-2000s off-topic reference), though his boastful rendition of Sir Mix-a-Lot’s “Jump on The Jurors Nicole.” Scherzinger and Ken Jeong thought he was a real hip hop superstar like LL Cool J, DJ Jazzy Jeff, Nas, Ice Cube or even TI (if that had been TI I’m pretty sure it’s TI the former” Blurred Lines contributor Robin would have figured that out quickly.)
Instead, this milk king turned out to be NFL running back Le’Veon Bell, who tried to battle the Lambs in a Roxbury-worthy duel with Haddaway’s “What Is Love,” but just couldn’t match their blissful, mixed-up gripes. But this might not be the last we’ll hear from Le’Veon, either. “I really try to show my talents, you know? A lot of people know me for football. I just wanted to go in a different direction and show people that I’m more talented in other things than just football,” he explained.
So that meant the reigning queen or queens retained their title for a second week: the fluffy flock known as the lambs. These pop starlets in sheep’s clothing harmonized beautifully with Alanis Morissette’s “Ironic” and had Nicole exclaiming, “Oh my god, your voices are amazing! You sound like a record up there!” Her girl group vocals alone made it clear that these musical mutton-and-chops were Wilson Phillips, as I suspected last week. But in case anyone reading this needs more convincing, these were the pointers:
We know the Lambs are childhood “besties,” and we’ve seen references to the SoCal cities of Beverly Hills and Venice — and Chynna Phillips, Carnie Wilson, and Wendy Wilson grew up together in California. We’ve seen the word ‘FAMOUS’ emblazoned on designer jeans – and these women have fame in their genes as descendants of John and Michelle Phillips of the Mamas and Papas and Brian Wilson of the Beach Boys. We saw a diamond ring – mostly like a reference to Bridesmaids, which featured an iconic cameo by Wilson Phillips. And the Lambs boasted they worked with Paul McCartney — and Wilson Phillips contributed backup vocals on McCartney’s “FourFiveSeconds” in 2015. “dreaming” (either a nod to the Mamas and the Papas’ biggest hit or Wilson Phillips’ own single “The Dream Is Still Alive”); and “Reality” (Wilson Phillips co-starred in her own reality TV series Still Holding On in 2012, and Carnie has appeared on several reality shows). It is absolutely not an impulsive guess when I say the Lambs are Wilson Phillips.
So can the Lambs last just one more day and make it to this season’s semifinals alongside reigning Queen of Bracket A Amber “The Harp” Riley? Find out next week when they face off against two other new contestants.
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