In 2019, a Dutch supermarket chain called Jumbo introduced its first Kleskassa. The kletskassa, which translation would be “chatbox”, is a slow box intended for those who are not in a hurry to do their shopping and who want to enjoy a little conversation. The initiative, which has been piloted in the small town of Vlijmen with just 14,000 inhabitants, has been a huge hit with customers, particularly older people, for whom a friendly chat with their usual cashier might be the most meaningful conversation of the day. Four years later, the Slow Boxes are available in more than 200 branches of the chain: “Many people feel lonely from time to time, especially older people,” said Colette Cloosterman-van Eerd, CEO of Jumbo, on the occasion of the initiative “As a family business and supermarket chain, we represent the heart of society and are therefore aware of the task of recognizing and combating loneliness.”
The advantages of the Kletschkasse not only benefit the customers, but also the employees of the company: “We are proud that many of our cashiers would like to work in the Kletschkasse. They loved the initiative and have a genuine interest in helping and connecting with other people,” added the Managing Director, “It’s a small gesture but very valuable, especially in a world that’s changing is accelerating at great speed.” In the Netherlands, loneliness is a growing problem: more than 10% of the population over the age of 15 admit to frequently feeling lonely, according to a study by the country’s municipal health service. This problem occurs not only in the Netherlands but worldwide, so much so that loneliness is also “an epidemic” for many experts.
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Several international studies indicate that more than one in three people in western countries usually or often feel lonely. We often tend to think that our strongest connections – family and close friends – are those that make us feel like we’re accompanied, but chatting good morning to the waiter in the usual cafeteria while greeting the person Taking the time to come to work or home and have a quick chat with a neighbor can also help us feel more connected to the world around us, less alone, and therefore happier.
The term “weak ties” was coined by American sociologist and professor Mark Granovetter in an influential 1973 paper entitled “The Strength of Weak Bonds”. Granovetter divided our social life into two groups: the first would be the inner circle of people with whom we speak often and with whom we feel closest (our strong bond), while the other would be an outer circle of acquaintances who we see less often or glimpse (weak attachments). Granovetter found that the second connections were more important for obtaining information and exploiting new opportunities than the first ones. For example, when it came to getting a new job, the sociologist showed only a minority found it through a close friend and the vast majority through an acquaintance.
In the Jumbo supermarkets in the Netherlands, they have launched the Kleskassa (The box to chat), it is similar to the traditional ones, but the employee who collects is ready to start a conversation with the customer. jumbo
In 2009, psychiatrist Karen L. Fingerman and writer and journalist Melinda Blau published an essay entitled Consequential Strangers: Turning Everyday Encounters Into Life-Changing Moments, in which they developed Granovetter’s theory and emphasized the importance our supporting characters have in our Having lives: “Our usual strangers often have resources or information that our close relationships don’t have. They provide impetus through new activities and ideas. And we live much better and much longer when we have deep ties and seemingly more superficial ties,” Karen L. Fingerman tells EL PAÍS.
Gillian Sandstrom is a Senior Lecturer in Psychology at the University of Essex who has spent 20 years studying the benefits of minimal social interactions with so-called weak ties, as well as the barriers that prevent people from connecting with one another. It all started with a professional reorientation: “After studying computer programming and 10 years as a programmer, I decided to study psychology, and when I came back to university I felt completely out of place: I was the oldest student and no, I’ve stopped asking myself things like, ‘am I sure I fit in here? Is that a good idea?” Sandstrom tells EL PAÍS. “Every day on my way to campus I would pass a hot dog stand that a woman was working. And I don’t know how it happened, but we started greeting each other every day and every day i felt a little bit better. i realized that this stranger i hadn’t crossed paths with meant more to me than greetings and smiles. it helped me to understand myself to feel connected.”
Sandstrom realized there were many more people he didn’t have a deep relationship with, but whose brief, everyday interactions helped him on a daily basis: from the campus cleaner to the waiter to the clerk at the store where he bought groceries for theirs Cats and knew their names: “I realized that I felt better about having these people in my life, so I asked myself, ‘Is it just me or does it matter to more people?’
During his PhD, he conducted an experiment to test the importance of relationships: for six days, he gave a group of people two counters to record their daily interactions. The first was used for them to count all the interactions they had with their closest bonds. The second with its weak ties. At the end of the day, they had to answer a series of questions about each type of interaction and develop their mood. “We came to two conclusions,” explains Sandstrom, “that people who had more interactions with weak attachments tended to be slightly happier, and those who increased the number of interactions—say, from seven people to 11—they tended to be happier.” .”
Writer Olivia Laing argued in the essay The Lonely City (Captain Swing, 2017) that “one can feel alone anywhere, but there is a particular flavor to the loneliness that city life evokes among millions of people,” argued the feeling of loneliness is not an individual problem but a collective one. Weak bonds also allow us to feel part of something: a group, a neighborhood, a community. In an interview with S Moda, Laing was asked how to deal with loneliness, to which she replied that the only cure was “to be kind and supportive,” adding, “We have to look out for each other, be kind to our neighbors , as best we can and try to advance individually in the community.
How it goes? “It is possible to generate many of the benefits of weak attachments by getting out into the world and engaging in some activity on a regular basis,” advises Karen L. Fingerman; “Over time, you’re likely to encounter the same people in these places. Similarly, participating in groups, classes, or activities can improve connections with a wider range of people.” “We need to remember two things,” adds Gillian Sandstrom, “first, that talking to strangers is also an act of Kindness to those around you is.” Because you never know how lonely or sad someone else might feel, and as with Kletschassa, apparent small talk can be very meaningful to others. And second, that we need to lose our fear of speaking to other people and find ways to relate to our immediate surroundings that we’ve forgotten with the advent of new technologies and the hangover of the pandemic. Sandstrom recalls, “No matter how introverted we may be, all people are looking for the same thing: connection.”
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