Published at 1:27 am. Updated at 3:00 p.m.
Express yourself without getting angry
I believe that parents’ upbringing of respect and politeness leaves something to be desired, probably because of the crazy lives we all lead because we don’t have time. I have a little trick that always works very well in my interactions with services of all kinds: first come with a smile and then, before explaining my problem, say: “Hello, I really need your help.” The local people are happy to respond to our inquiries. The beautiful French language gives us enough words to express our grievances clearly and without violence or insults. It just distracts the person you’re talking to.
Lorraine Lemay, Saint-Jean-sur-Richelieu
Behaviors to check
I too notice these warnings about language, verbal violence, etc. everywhere. It would also be interesting to discuss the topic of receptionists, employees and professionals in the way they greet customers. Some don’t even glance at their interlocutor, others give a dull look, others don’t bother to give a complete answer and act rashly. I have noticed these three behaviors, especially towards older people. I’ve experienced it before too.
Claire Pelletier, Matane
Recognize your wrongs
Rudeness, like many other concepts of coexistence in society, is open to interpretation and to a large extent relative. But above all there is the famous freedom of expression. How do you mark it? The way of expressing oneself varies from person to person, culture to culture, and evolves over time. Nothing is easy. Think of the proverbial shouting matches we see in movies, when two Italian ladies look like they’re arguing to some, and downright freaking out to those unfamiliar with the series. Should we build a shell? Let’s give ourselves the right to debate it and recognize our limits and our injustices.
Marc-André de Launière, Trois-Rivières
Support for teachers
Having been a teacher for more than 30 years, I too have been a victim of rudeness, especially in my last years. This was one of the reasons why I retired from work earlier than planned. Parents yelling at us on the phone. Violent gestures during bulletin meetings. I was even called a pedophile in the school hallway after an argument with a student in crisis. In short, these events have deeply disturbed me and the community should do more to protect teachers. It is unfortunate that school management sometimes fails to provide support in the face of this scourge. It seems that they are surprised by this phenomenon.
Marc Bouchard, Trois-Rivieres
Raise your voice… to be heard
I ride my bike to work. At least three times a week I get cut off, yelled at, barely avoid doors, or avoid a car parked in the bike path. When one of these events occurs, to warn of my presence, I must raise my voice loudly to make myself heard. Sorry, but the little “cute” bell doesn’t work. Please know that I’m not angry, I just want to be heard and seen, that’s all!
Pierre Cayer, Montreal
Advocacy for training
I am responsible for a municipal team of communications officers responsible for responding to emails and calls regarding law enforcement issues and have often been on the front lines of demonstrations of incivility by disgruntled citizens. In order to be prepared to deal with this difficult customer segment, our employer required us to complete training on this topic. We learned to view these difficult communications as challenges that we needed to try to mitigate. This training has not only helped us all to better manage our means of communication, but it has also allowed us to better understand our own “flaws” that often (without recognizing them) ignite the spark of aggressiveness or rudeness. Of course, there will still inevitably be a few trolls who will look for you and cleverly lead you down the slippery trail of bad words!
Louis Fugere, Eastman