In the overflowing world of parenting, we all do what we can with the best of intentions. All? No, in a small village lives a group of irreducible parents who excel at constantly annoying, irritating, or humiliating you without the need for a magic potion.
We’ll never know if they’re doing it on purpose or are totally unaware of the impact of their behavior. If you definitely want to get out of anonymity and stand out like that, here are 10 tips that will make you a really annoying parent.
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Forget the unwritten pact of only using the WhatsApp group at school for important matters and satiate it by sending photos of your kids with another kid in class when they’re at the park. If possible, send large and heavy ones to waste more data and waste time on busy parents thinking they are important messages.If you want to make a difference when other parents report that their child is absent from class because of illness, instead of the “Get well soon” log, include a photo of your child happy and not sniffling with something like “Fine, mine’s fine.” .Every time you meet a father, especially when he is in a hurry and you see that he is overwhelmed by his son, you try to corner him in order to gloss over your son’s virtues. Make it clear that he is a prodigy and that the other kids are having a hard time and will never be at his level.At parent meetings, if you see everyone very tired and wanting to leave, raise your hand to reveal your particular parenting system with the saying, “I have more of a reflection than a question.”Look down and comment on all the foods other parents are giving their kids. Whether it’s industrial or natural, with or without sugar, high or low… The watchword for sowing discord is, “Are you sure it’s good for you?”Cite English terms and foreign names with conviction to indicate that you know a lot more about parenting than others. Once you say Montessori you can make up the following surnames and it won’t appear.In all conversations, talk about your son at all times, even if they’re irrelevant and even if you have to force the anecdotes to include them. This gives you an additional antipathy among your childless classmates, who you with the uncomfortable sentence: “And you for when?”Try to be paternalistic and know-it-all with first-time visitors. Take away all the importance of their dramas, no matter how many times you’ve been through the same thing. And if you have two or more kids, always rub it so they know the real parenting job is you and theirs is a simple picnic in the sun.Always emphasize to people who are having a very hard time making ends meet how much all your children’s unnecessary extracurricular expenses are costing you. And he adds the closing tagline, “I’m not saving a single buck for her,” which makes her feel even worse for not being able to give the same to her family.And when you have the time and inclination to crush the minds of more parents, take up a position of power in the AFA, AMPA, APA, or whatever you call it, at your children’s center and feel like a Minister of Small Matters. Now you can control the sleeping place of the extracurricular and the feasts of the course. Now you can feel the power.If you consistently apply these tips, you’ll gain followers who will be intrigued or amazed by your exemplary upbringing, and people who will look at you in disgust (which will be the majority, although you won’t even care because you’re muted become your empathy). Be that as it may, just like rock stars and celebrities, you will not leave anyone indifferent.
Martin Pinol He is the author of 33 books, his children’s series The Monster Kitchen has been published in several countries. His latest novel is The Shadow Club.
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