Published at 1:18 am. Updated at 9:00 a.m.
Émilie Bibeau Special collaboration
Yes, once again the year is coming to an end and here we are, with our tongues on the ground, as they say, exhausted from the mental strain, the stress and the end of the world.
Nothing new under the sun, unfortunately we are burned here and desperately need some relaxation between the ox and the gray donkey.
A jar of bubbles, Christmas stockings and sleep. Nothing else is on the agenda.
Forgetting that the flowers still bloomed in November, that it rained ash in the summer, that we learned nothing and that people killed others for nothing in terrible wars or in four and a half years when the neighbor had no idea.
Again and again.
That we can travel to a new planet or create software that perfectly reproduces Tom Hanks' voice, but that we can't cure your favorite aunt's pancreatic cancer or repair a tendon that has been driving you crazy for six years…
“Come on, Hop!, a little sincerity, the world is in tears! » sang Jean Leloup.
Enough to make you want to live a hermit life for the rest of your days, alone and far from all this dreary masquerade!
However, the real tragedy would lie there, isolated…
One day, during one of the many phone conversations I have with my parents, my father says to me:
“Did you see that, Kiki? [affectueux surnom] ? They founded a Ministry of Loneliness in Japan… It's special, right?
— A Ministry of Solitude? But what exactly does he do? »
And it doesn't take much to discover that this ministry actually exists, that it was born after a wave of immense and serious hardship, aggravated, among other things, by an excessive appreciation of work but also by the loneliness that many impose on themselves , by isolating themselves from the outside world and glued to their screens.
In Japan, these people who live in their room without ever going out are called hikikomori. Without social contacts, without interest in work, they hardly talk to anyone, and this can take several years.
Specifically, the Ministry of Loneliness will work to enact laws to counteract this isolation, for example by enacting laws to make working hours less strenuous. “Let’s be humane and less bureaucratic,” he said.
Guillaume Piedboeuf, in a very nice text on the Radio-Canada website, explains that people in Japan are ashamed to ask for help, and Koki Ozora, who has advocated for a Ministry of Loneliness, explains: “I think that the feeling of loneliness that is the root of all their problems. »1
Even if they have their own problems, it would be dishonest to associate this phenomenon only with Japan and not question ourselves.
In a time when talking on the phone makes us anxious, when a person smiling at us on the street worries us… When we are in constant contact with a screen that gives us the illusion of the other's presence ; Where sometimes, against our will, we tend to seek recognition through “likes” and through the number of “views” that satisfy our brain, as if our definition were self-accumulated rewards that lead to a higher, Leading from the other confirmed table, I remember this particularly. It's a shame to admit our weakness, to run poorly. The shame of exposing our flaws for fear of rejection, the shame of expressing a fundamental need for love and connection.
The pride in perfection that takes up too much space.
We must believe that even in 2023, showing your mistakes is still frowned upon and even dishonorable.
And yet, despite our fear, our lives must have meaning, it is fundamental. And we find that meaning in others. I am convinced of it. Because it is through real contact with others that we reveal ourselves and elevate ourselves. As Albert Jacquard so aptly said, “I am the connection that I weave with others.”
Recently, in an issue of Philosophy Magazine, I re-read a reflection on a clever fundraising campaign by the Abbé Pierre Foundation, which states: “Hell is oneself, cut off from others,” in contrast to the Sartre quote “ Hell is other people.” Interesting considerations in which we have to decide whether hell can be both ourselves and others.
Even Simone de Beauvoir, Sartre's famous companion, argued for the necessity of the other: “I cannot go into the future alone.” I would get lost in a desert where all my steps would be indifferent. »
Because a little solitude in everyday life is necessary, but the great solitude, the true one, which we do not choose, is an insidious monster that can lead the weakest astray. And the mistake would be to believe that the others are the most fragile.
Because the abandoned, the unhappy, the damaged, the self-confident, the poorly “equipped”… it’s a bit like all of us at some point. And while the world is burning, as they say, there is one thing left for us: to be together, whether we suffer or not, in silence or not, to hug each other, to understand each other, to look for a little light somewhere and to find that we You are not so alone after all.
Strong, solid, loving, differentiated and unifying bonds are what I wish for us as the holidays approach.
Sincerely.
Who is Emilie Bibeau?
- Émilie Bibeau is an actress. We saw them mainly on television in Unité 9 and Temps de chien.
- In 2020 she published the chronicle collection Cœur Vintage, published by Cardinal.
- The web series Cœur vintage from his book has been broadcast on Tou.tv Extra since December 7th.