An Australian matchmaker and relationship expert has asked whether women prefer men to plan first dates or whether it’s better to work together – and the results were surprising.
Louanne Ward, who lives in Perth, took to the Facebook page She Said, He Said to ask what her followers thought of a first date protocol – and whether it was better to be swept off their feet by a new potential partner to become.
“When it comes to first dates, do you like it when a guy decides where to go and book everything? Or do you prefer he asks you where you want to go and you have to choose the venue?’ She said.
“When you start dating someone, that’s part of the romance when the other person plans dates and makes an effort to book everything without needing feedback. Is it a sign of confidence and part of chivalry? When does it become a fair exchange of scheduled appointments?’
Its 2,500 members took turns giving their opinions, with many saying they would rather have a collaborative effort than a one-man show.
Louanne Ward, who lives in Perth, took to the Facebook page She Said, He Said to ask what her followers thought of a first date protocol – and whether it was better to be swept off their feet by a new potential partner to become
“What a great question. The girl I’m dating right now is an event planner, so this is her very ally. I organized our first two dates (casual drink at a local pub, then Holly Molly Golf) for the second, then she started arranging the next few. answered a man.
“I think you could say it’s 50/50 between us when it comes to organizing things that need to be done for us.”
Another man added: “My wife likes it when I plan everything until she doesn’t anymore. Sometimes she wants to do it.
Louanne replied to the commenter: “We all have different values and things that are important to us. As a woman, she undoubtedly loves to be spoiled with gestures that mean something to her, but by planning things she also spoils you while teaching you more about who she is and what she likes.
Another man added: “My wife likes it when I plan everything until she doesn’t anymore. Sometimes she wants to do it” (archive image)
opinion poll
Would you rather plan a first date with a man or work together?
- A man plans 19 votes
- I don’t mind contributing 27 votes
One Australian said he enjoys “taking the lead” on dates but warned against choosing “spooky” spots like the beach so you can just “feed your eyes”.
“Eat well, even to a play and dinner, but do your homework and ask what you like,” he said.
One woman said she would prefer to be hosted and entertained by a man and has had the “best” experience doing so.
“I honor and respect a man who is proactive in this regard and as such I was on the best and most surprising dates when this happened and I loved them yes that’s definitely a positive trait for me and a preference , It says a lot about how I feel,” she said.
Another said: “I like a man who takes the initiative and asks a woman out, but I like being involved in the planning of the date, especially when it comes to food because there are a lot of foods that.” I can’t eat!
“Surprise activities are great too. Overall, I don’t think the responsibility should lie with one person taking the lead in arranging each date. It’s nice for both sides to do something. I think it shows appreciation for each other.’
One woman said she would prefer to be hosted and entertained by a man and has had the “best” experience doing so (Louanne pictured).
Why these statements are keeping you from finding your perfect match
- Louanne Ward, a dating expert from Australia, shared that both men and women should avoid saying, “I have no expectations.”
- She added that the five words inadvertently drive people away in the early stages of dating
- The matchmaker said that when dating there are always expectations, such as her date arriving on time, what her photos look like and who she says they are
- The ‘orange flag statement’ could mean that your date isn’t emotionally ready for a relationship and that it’s ‘wasting your time’.
- “I don’t need a man,” was the next statement the matchmaker warned women to stop
- She said these five words make men lose interest because dating is a game to them and finding their soulmate is their “prize”.
- While she realized that independent, confident, and successful women don’t need a man, they may need all the things a man can give, like support, affection, and love
Louanne previously opened up about what turns women off on first dates: men who talk about themselves all night.
According to Louanne, a man who only talks about himself can show a lack of confidence and give him a “more feminine energy,” which tends to turn women off.
Instead, the dating guru said that date conversation should be “like a tennis match,” where each person goes back and forth, asking and answering questions to learn more about their date.
Louanne said men who talk about themselves all the time cause two “negative reflexes and reactions.”
“Talking about all your accomplishments and talking about possessions that you own and all the things that you’ve done you have to do to try and impress the lady,” she said.
“You feel like you’re not bringing anything else to the table, that she’s not going to like you just for you, so you’re showing a lack of confidence, and if there’s one thing that turns a woman off, a man is that has no faith.’
Second, a man who doesn’t let the woman talk or ask about her puts him in a “feminine energy” and she in a “masculine energy.”
“The feminine speaks and the masculine listens. As you talk, you throw yourself into your feminine energy, which doesn’t really turn women on,” Louanne said.
Louanne said a date should be thought of as a “game of tennis” rather than a “one-way street.”
“Just remember on a date, it’s supposed to be a little bit like a tennis match, you hit the ball past and she hits it back, it’s not supposed to be a two-way street,” she said.