—Honey, I don’t know how to tell you this, but there is a Chinese family in our bathroom.
The phrase is said by Tom (Joseph Gordon-Levitt) to Summer (Zooey Deschanel) in the film (500) Days Together. The reason none of the characters get upset beforehand is because they are actually at Ikea, where the characters of this romantic comedy are having a date inspired by an experience of one of the feature film’s screenwriters, Michael H. Weber. “The first time I went to Ikea with my girlfriend, it was fun because it was like playing house,” he explained to Entertainment Weekly. He later clarified that it wasn’t as fun the second time.
For many couples, Ikea is an emotional hell doomed to arguments, the moment when romance gives way to the abyss of discovering that the person you thought you loved has bad taste. However, what can be hell for an established couple can be heaven for new lovebirds. It’s becoming increasingly popular to live in that endless apartment with a minimalist aesthetic where everything seems to be under control and where would-be couples can dream of a perfect life together without anyone panicking over fears of commitment.
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“After the first date in a public place and after building trust, we can expand our hangouts to make them more fun and unique. “Creative ideas leave room to express our personalities and provide fun activities that help us bond,” Caroline West, psychologist and sexologist at Bumble, tells ICON. In the application they comment that the role play of playing house is closely linked to a certain romantic idea of love, especially in a place where we have a lot to do and learn about our date or partner. And the brand knows it. Last February, Ikea Netherlands organized 10,000 appointments at its Utrecht branch. “Ikea hopes to provide a partner to many singles looking for warmth this winter,” it said on its website.
Inflation-proof dating
When we talk about dates at Ikea, we can’t help but talk about the so-called “inflationating”, a trend that leads singles to opt for cheaper dates in order to avoid the crazy prices on absolutely everything in general and leisure activities in particular to counteract. This phenomenon is reported by the Meetic app, which indicates that Spanish singles have significantly changed their dating habits. According to the studies included with the application, 32% admit that they have a smaller budget for their appointments today than they did six months ago. While previously there were meetings in shopping centers where you could roam around protected from the cold and heat and eat cheaply, now the romance has given way to IKEA.
A couple holds hands in an empty room at Ikea in Chicago. Star Tribune via Getty Images (Star Tribune via Getty Images)
That’s exactly what Lucía C., a 39-year-old musician, experienced in her new relationship. “I had been dating my current partner for a few weeks when she suggested we go to IKEA together. I admit that it was a shock at first, because when you look at the furniture you think about a life together and think: But we hardly know each other! However, I have to admit that it was a lot of fun. We got to know each other better and in those hours between intimate lights and happy couples talked about things that I don’t think we would have talked about in a bar. In the end we ate meatballs and although I don’t know whether the relationship will develop further or not, and although this was not the most romantic date of my life, it was the most constructive and in some ways strange. ” he explains.
For her part, Amabel Bardera Rojo, general health psychologist and couples therapist, believes that we have reached a point where many have become tired of the superficiality of classic dates and conversations based on the same questions. “That is why it is not uncommon that there are people who choose meetings where the context favors the emergence of their true identity, in order to really connect with the other person and get to know them a little deeper.” However, he warns that that “love goes through different phases and if we go straight to re-establishing a dynamic of living together, we are skipping some important steps so that this living together enters into reality in a satisfactory way.” When we learn to live together, it is because there is love gives.”
Too intimate for you?
There are 29 million videos on TikTok under the hashtag #ikeadates, so it seems that Swedish meatballs are the new sushi and that candlelit dinners are being ditched in favor of a stroll through the daybed area. “Ikea is a place that reflects the construction of a house,” says Amabel Bardera Rojo. But that’s not always a positive thing, which is why he adds, “If you decide to go on a date at IKEA, the other person may feel it’s an invasion of their privacy.” I may need to get to know you in another way first. This can lead to rejection and cause the other person to close themselves off and put up walls and barriers because they feel completely overwhelmed,” he warns.
The love between FRAKTA bags is undoubtedly suggestive, but you have to keep an eye on each other’s times. If all goes well, one can adopt the headline that the New York Times dedicated to an engineering couple whose wedding was published in the famous and coveted “Unions and Commitments” column: “They Passed the Ikea Test.”
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