Gwyneth Paltrow, Terry Sanderson and Kristin Van Orman
Rick Bowmer-Pool/Getty Images (2); Image courtesy
While Gwyneth Paltrow’s ski crash trial didn’t deliver exactly the same level of celebrity drama as Johnny Depp did against Amber Heard, the eight-day showdown in Park City, Utah, nonetheless managed to provide plenty of bizarre moments leading up to its climax on Thursday, when the A jury ruled that in plaintiff Dr. Terry Sanderson is not liable, which claimed she collided with the retired doctor on a ski slope, resulting in ongoing health problems.
Below are nine of the weirdest, funniest, and most memorable moments from the trial that managed to turn a relatively routine ski slope run-in into a surreal legal spectacle. And yes, they are in order of least to wildest.
9. “I wish you the best…” After nodding ceremonially as the trial verdict was read, Paltrow seemed to whisper a few parting words to Sanderson after six years of contentious litigation: “I wish you the best.” Which, you know, is pretty nice — albeit a little not one person who watched Paltrow endure “being treated like a punching bag,” as her attorney put it at the trial, actually believes it.
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After a jury finds her not at fault, Gwyneth Paltrow appears to whisper “I wish you the best” to Terry Sanderson, the man who sued her over a 2016 skiing accident in Utah. pic.twitter.com/8veYt0gQIk
— The Recount (@therecount) March 30, 2023
8th. Paltrow’s attorney Stephen Owens appeared to seal the deal against Sanderson on the penultimate day of testimony when he called Sanderson back to the witness stand and shared a slideshow of his social media posts since the accident, showing the 76-year-old apparently an active and happy one lifestyle from vacation to vacation, which seemed to contradict his claims that the accident left him with “permanent traumatic brain injuries… suffering and loss of zest for life.” Owens said during the closure: “He doesn’t tell him [doctors] He flies all over the world, he rides his bike, he’s the figurehead for fitness at 75! he posts [online] every damn thing. It’s not like I’m going to send out a private investigator and try to find pictures. All I have to do is [type] ‘Terry Sanderson’, and my God – that man is Mr Activity.”
7. Sanderson’s attorneys came up with a rather interesting final defense for their client, apparently realizing they faced an uphill battle. Robert Sykes surprised the audience – amid frequent phlegm coughs from a cold – by declaring: “I believe Gwyneth Paltrow. … She says, “Terry punched me in the back…” I think she sincerely believes she was punched in the back. … She is not a liar. But sincere belief doesn’t make it so.” It seemed ripe for the dodgeball meme: Brave strategy, Cotton, let’s see if it pays off for him.
6. Sanderson’s final defense had some digressions. The team got into the Magna Carta, pilgrims, and even broke the Latin definition of “judgment” (sir, is that going to be tested?). But the most surreal “Where is this going?” bit was the longer cow milking anecdote, which went like this (and mind you, this is a vastly shortened version): “I was in the Legislature with a guy named Glen Brown. He invited me to his farm. Young lawyer showing me how to milk cows. Never done. I got up there and he showed me his barn. It was really nifty. But if you think about why Terry never came home [metaphorically speaking, from his ski trip accident], think of this story: He put a little stool out there for me. I sat down in my jeans and tried to milk the cow by hand. It’s very difficult to do. I was able to squeeze out a little milk. I said, ‘How do you do all this?’ He showed me this very sophisticated machine that milks cows automatically. He says, “Without that, Bob, I would never make it.” … This milking mechanism was the executive function for Glen Brown’s farm. Now, one of Terry’s saddest issues is his loss of executive function… and that’s why a part of him is still up there [on the ski slope].” And that digression is why lawyers probably shouldn’t be paid by the hour.
5. While another Sanderson attorney, Lawrence Buhler, tried to explain his client’s sometimes off-putting personality on the witness stand: “When people get to know each other [Sanderson], after a while they don’t want anything to do with him anymore. These are real injuries. … Your personality is constantly changing. … You lose everyone who knows you. You lose everyone – your family, they will put up with you, and maybe the lawyers. But really, they just put up with you.” He then suggested that the jury award his client $3.2 million, which would be a bit like saying, “Sure, our client is acting like a jerk, and we like it Neither does him, but this is all Gwyneth Paltrow’s fault, so you should give him millions of dollars.”
4. Sanderson’s attorney Kristin VanOrman took the stand against Paltrow. Lawyers often jump back and forth between friendly charm and vicious attacks during trials to throw witnesses off guard and open up, but some of VanOrman’s remarks sounded a bit like fangirl cringe to viewers: VanOrman asked about Paltrow’s height (“just under 5 ’10”) and then VanOrman gushed, “I’m so jealous!” Paltrow replied, “I think I’m shrinking though.” VanOrman: “I have to wear 4 inch heels just to make it to 5’5”. Paltrow assured dryly, “You’re very nice.” VanOrman later called Paltrow “small, but whoa…” and then added, as if scolding herself, “Actually, you’re not that small…” When Paltrow confirmed that she’s a good tipper, VanOrman added, “Fantastic! I wouldn’t expect anything less.” It felt like VanOrman was that close to taking Paltrow to brunch.
3. Sanderson’s attorneys once wanted the Oscar winner to physically recreate the crash, raising the specter of someone pressing Paltrow’s back in the courtroom. The idea was all the more alarming because Paltrow said she briefly wondered if she had been sexually assaulted during the collision. Fortunately, the judge quickly shot down the idea. “A credit to the judge for not allowing Gwyneth to be attacked in front of all of us,” Owens said.
2. VanOrman went viral when she asked Paltrow about her $1 counterclaim. Paltrow replied, “Well, I lost half a day of skiing.” The quote was correct and even appropriate for the question, since Paltrow’s bill for the ski resort was more than $9,000 and she is countersuing a token $1. But the privileged elite vibe was ripe for online mockery and memes — especially given that even Paltrow’s team admitted Sanderson broke four ribs in the collision.
1. Sanderson didn’t exactly add to his credibility when he suddenly seemed to be comparing Paltrow to convicted late pedophile Jeffrey Epstein. VanOrman asked if he regretted filing his lawsuit. Sanderson replied, “I think that’s the purpose, to make me regret filing this lawsuit. It’s the pain of suing a celebrity.” Pressured about whether filing this lawsuit was important to him, Sanderson began to get frustrated and half-swear, “That was it. I was hurt badly and there were so many insults to add to that… Obviously this is an issue that someone has to take responsibility for. If they aren’t held accountable, they will be.” Then, here’s what happened: “Now we have the… molesting of little children on an island – denial!” Paltrow’s attorney was quick to slam the settlement as “ridiculous testimony.” To her credit, VanOrman ended her questioning as soon as possible.