In his 2022 Netflix special The King’s Jester, comedian Hasan Minhaj confessed that the quest for social media influence had become a toxic presence in his life. Of course, that was before Elon Musk took over Twitter.
Now, as guest host of The Daily Show on Wednesday night, the longtime Twitter critic decided to put his money where his mouth is and exit the platform for good during the live taping.
Minhaj began by arguing that despite what many Twitter users have been saying over the past few weeks and months, “Elon didn’t make Twitter terrible, Twitter has been terrible for years. Because of us!” He called the platform “worse than Tinder, and Tinder gives you genital herpes.”
“But no matter how bad it gets, no one ever leaves!” he continued. After systematically dismantling the various excuses people like to use to stay, Minhaj wondered why anyone would be tweeting at all. “You share your opinion, you argue with people and then you might lose your job!” he said. “It’s a platform with no dialogue, no mercy, no forgiveness. It’s all beheadings and ISIS clout.”
“I don’t care which side of the aisle you’re on,” Minhaj told Twitter’s most prolific users. “Put down the crack pipe and exit Twitter like you said. What happened to the mass exodus when Elon took over?”
To everyone who claimed they were moving to the Twitter alternative Mastodon, he said, “You bloody cowards!” Rising from his chair, he added, “You’re bitching about Elon all the time, but you’re not going to stop!” And then: “You don’t give a damn about your values!”
As he paced the stage, he started yelling, “I hate Twitter! I want to get out! give me back my sanity Clear my mind!”
Eventually, he came to realize that he was the “living embodiment” of Twitter’s “judgment of other people without changing anything about myself.” With that, he pulled out his phone and said, “Fuck it, I’m leaving Twitter. I’m leaving this hellscape at once!”
After clicking the disable button for all to see, Minhaj stood on his desk and shouted, “I’m free!” By the time of the show, his hundreds of thousands of followers were gone and all that was left was an error message that read: “This account does not exist.”
Find out more on Hasan Minhaj’s The Last Laugh podcast.