Communication is important in couples, so be careful of this very bad habit that many have and which, according to this communication specialist, can lead to “real breakups”.
You talk to your partner. You’re explaining something important to him and he interrupts you. You are upset(e). It is normal. Being interrupted “can seem demeaning and condescending” defends Maria Venetis, associate professor of communication, interviewed by the New York Times. “It’s annoying. This suggests that my ideas or participation are not valid” specifies the professor. There can be constant interruptions in a couple real breakdowns in understanding, connection and trust” warns Dr. Alexandra Solomon, American psychologist in the columns of the New York Times. Please take note of this Women are interrupted more often than men This is according to several studies, including one by researchers at George Washington University. But no matter whether you are a man or a woman, Frequently interrupting your partner can really harm communication and jeopardize your relationship.
How to avoid getting cut off?
Dr. Solomon shares some keys to combat interruptions, whether you are the cause or the victim.
► Start by telling the other person that he tends to cut you off so he notices. But not at any time. “Start a conversation with your partner when you are not in the middle of the action“, advises the psychologist.
“Ask yourself if you’re all speaking at the same time.”
► Identify the cause This tendency to cut people off can be remedied. For example, ask him: “How did the people in your family speak when you were growing up?”
► Your conversation partner seems to you impatient or disinterested during your conversation? Be careful, you could be the switch. “Ask yourself if each of you speaks for approximately the same amount of time“, advises the psychologist. “That’s what you should strive for,” adds Dr. Solomon added.
► At the time of an interruption Quietly give your partner a signalB. by raising your hand to signal that you want to finish your thought. You can anticipate by stating this in advance that you have something to share and would like to pursue your idea, while letting him know that he will have time to respond when you are finished.