“Murderous” Mayo Clinic doctor Connor Bowman had “fallen in love” with another woman in the weeks before his wife’s fatal poisoning, her best friend has revealed.
Betty, a 32-year-old pharmacist living in an open marriage, was concerned that her husband Connor was becoming increasingly obsessed with the woman he invited to sleep in their marital home, friend Sarah Leeser told in a statement exclusive interview.
As a bisexual, Betty herself was dating two people — a man and a woman — at the time of her death on Aug. 20, Leeser said. However, she had met Connor's new love interest and was worried about how serious things would become between them.
Bowman, 30, a poison expert, is accused of killing his wife by spiking the gout drug colchicine in her smoothie. He had taken out insurance for her for half a million lidfe.
The case was upgraded from second-degree murder to first-degree murder last week.
“Betty didn't understand why he was so in love,” said Sarah, 32. “They both saw different people.” But there was something different about this girl. It was more of an obsession.'
In an interview with , Sarah Leeser (left) described the warning signs that made her suspicious about the death of her best friend Betty Bowman on August 20
Betty, 32, a surgical pharmacist who worked with her husband at the top hospital in Rochester, Minnesota, died of a sudden illness a few days after her hospitalization
Investigators allege Betty's husband, Connor Bowman, a doctor at the Mayo Clinic, slipped a fatal dose of the gout drug colchicine into her smoothie
At some point, Connor and the woman “separated,” Sarah said. “He was super depressed and wanted to be with her all the time.”
Betty, who died on August 20, was also upset that her husband often lied about his activities and whereabouts, telling her he was at work when he was actually on a date.
“It was the lying and keeping secrets that became the problem,” Sarah said.
But there were other factors threatening their marriage, including her attitude toward children: Connor wanted to start a family. Not Betty.
“Betty wasn’t ready, Connor was,” Sarah said. “That was part of the discussion towards the end.”
As Betty considered whether the marriage could be saved, Sarah said she and other friends offered her a place to stay.
Still, amid the turmoil, Sarah said she wasn't afraid Connor would harm her. She never knew he was physically abusive.
She also didn't recognize warning signs when Betty suddenly ended up sick in the hospital or when Connor told her that Betty, a healthy woman, was suffering from hemophagocytic lymphohistiocytosis (HLH), a rare disease that causes her organs to fail.
She noted that after Betty's death, it bothered her when Connor started talking about getting a $500,000 life insurance policy and when he started openly flaunting his relationship with the new girlfriend.
Just days after Betty's death, Sarah said, Connor invited his lover to join her and other mutual friends at a winery, where she saw them smiling, kissing and hugging.
Sarah (pictured with the couple) revealed that although the couple had agreed to an open marriage, Betty had become increasingly concerned about Connor's new romantic pursuits and dishonest behavior
Friends described the 30-year-old widower as “stoic and calm” and even “happy or at least indifferent” in the days after his wife's death.
Betty's death was deemed suspicious after a friend contacted police to tell them the couple was having marital problems due to infidelity and Bowman's alleged debts
It wasn't until a few days later that investigators realized that Sarah had become suspicious and began to question everything that had happened before and after Betty's death.
Given the breakdown of his marriage, could Connor have killed her best friend to get what he wanted – a debt-free new life with a woman who wanted children?
Police later quoted Sarah by her initials, SEL, in an affidavit detailing the allegations against Connor, accusing him of putting poison in Betty's smoothie after weeks of research into how much gout medication it would take to kill a woman their size to kill.
“SEL reported that on August 16, 2023, she received a text message from the victim stating that the victim was very sick, had gone to the hospital, and things had gone downhill,” the affidavit states .
“SEL reported that the victim was a healthy individual.” “The victim had told others that Bowman had debts, so they maintained separate bank accounts,” it continued.
“Bowman told SEL that he would be purchasing $500,000 in life insurance due to the victim’s death. Bowman also told SEL early on that the victim suffered from HLH.
Sarah has been following the case nonstop over the past few weeks, posting online tributes to her best friend, organizing a GoFundMe to help her parents and sharing updates on Facebook.
In her interview with , she looked for a motive.
“Everything that's come out so far seems to point to the life insurance and the news that he's in debt,” Sarah said, explaining that Betty told her about Connor's debts after seeing his credit card statements.
“It could be a combination of the other woman, but that doesn't make sense either because Betty would have given him a divorce,” she added. “There’s really no motive that makes sense.”
Sarah met Betty in high school in Wichita, Kansas and they became best friends and lived together shortly after college.
Bowman, who recently completed pharmacy training at the Mayo Clinic and is a poison control specialist, is said to have asked the coroner's office to cremate his wife's body “immediately” after her death
Sarah said she was on vacation with her family in mid-August when Betty wrote to her saying she was experiencing extreme symptoms and was “scared.”
The friend also revealed that the couple had disagreements about having children – he wanted to start a family, she wasn't ready
Sarah said she was disturbed when, shortly after Betty's death, Connor began talking about taking out $500,000 in life insurance and began openly flaunting his relationship with the new girlfriend
After her death, Betty's family attended a memorial service organized by Connor in Rochester. Her family held a celebration of life in Wichita on Oct. 7, but he didn't show up. They shared a brochure from the celebration with
She also met Connor after he started dating Betty at Kansas University.
She attended the couple's lavish wedding in Independence, Missouri in 2021 and continued to see her friend frequently and communicate daily.
“It was good at the beginning,” Sarah said of the couple’s relationship.
“She had a lot of friends, but he didn’t,” she added. “He was very loving and she praised him.”
Betty's mother Nancy and sister Brianna told that Connor had told them she had HLH and admitted they didn't question it at the time
“She would say he had a great work ethic and was very smart. “Obviously that changed later.”
Betty, friendly and sociable, dated men and women, most of whom she met in person.
Connor had a much more active sex life and dated women he met through dating apps, Sarah said.
They both brought home dates every now and then, she explained.
But Connor often wasn't honest about who he was with and when.
“Betty valued open communication,” Sarah said. “She was the quietest person ever, but she stood up for herself.”
Sarah was vacationing with her family in Branson, Missouri, in mid-August when Betty messaged her to say she was suffering from severe diarrhea.
“She wrote, 'I have no idea what's going on' and 'I'm scared,'” Sarah recalled.
She rushed back from her vacation to visit Betty in the hospital.
Betty was already weak and lost consciousness. As Sarah left the hospital at night, she said: “I made a joke and she kind of squeezed my hand and I went to bed thinking she was getting better.”
“The next day they wheeled her into the operating room area and that’s when things went downhill.”
Connor was present throughout the entire ordeal.
“He was there and kept us all informed,” he said. “He seemed very stoic and matter-of-fact.”
He repeatedly communicated his belief that she had HLH.
A few days after Betty's death, Connor invited Sarah to his home to pack up some of Betty's belongings. He also asked permission to bring his girlfriend, she said.
“I said okay, mostly because I was curious,” Sarah said.
Connor sent them all to Four Daughters Vineyard in Spring Valley, Minnesota.
“They were loving,” Sarah said. “They held hands. They were cuddling on the couch.'
After returning to Bowman's house that evening, Sarah went home. Connor's girlfriend stayed, she said.
She said the couple separated after investigators began asking questions.
“I think she thought Betty had died of natural causes and felt bad,” she said.
Connor also became anxious in those early days, she said, as he organized a funeral in Rochester, Minnesota, that emphasized his love for Betty, as if he needed to demonstrate her closeness to an ongoing investigation.
“It was all pictures of him and Betty, none of her with her family or growing up,” Sarah said. “It's like he's saying, 'I'm a loving husband, I'm not a murderer.'
He also made the strange revelation to Sarah that he was in for a stroke of luck.
“He mentioned a few times that he would take out life insurance on her,” said Sarah, who told him she hoped he would use some of that money to support Betty's family and give Christmas and birthday gifts to relatives and her friends' children send. like Betty always would.
Sarah's children would call her “Aunt Betty,” and half her daughter's room is decorated with things from her beloved friend.
Later, Connor began questioning Sarah and some of Betty's other friends who were contacted by investigators.
“He called a lot of people to find out what we all said,” Sarah told . “He was angrier than usual. “He was definitely surprised.”
Connor was eventually arrested in October and charged with second-degree murder.
The charge was upgraded last week to first-degree murder and carries a life sentence if convicted.
The case received national attention, but Sarah said she didn't want people to lose sight of the victim.
“I just miss my best friend,” she said, her voice shaking. “She was just the most beautiful person, intelligent, gave 100 percent to her work and even when she was late, it was because she was buying things, treats for people,” she said.
“She just really cared about people and always let everyone know how much she loved them.”
“I think the news is focused on him and the open relationship,” she continued. “It's very easy to dramatize everything, this very crazy case involving two doctors from the Mayo Clinic. “But most of all, she was a wonderful, loving woman who didn't deserve this.”
Bowman wrote an obituary after his wife's death, saying she died of a “sudden onset autoimmune and infectious disease.” Prosecutors allege he tried to rush her cremation and dissuade doctors from performing an autopsy
Sarah has set up a GoFundMe account to help Nancy and her family with legal fees, transportation to Minnesota, memorial costs and other related expenses.
Of Connor, Sarah said: “I hope he stays in prison forever and never gets parole.”
Betty's mother and one of her sisters spoke to in an earlier interview last week and shared that Betty started talking about divorce because he wasn't open about the women he slept with.
“They had an open relationship and both were okay with it,” said Betty Bowman's younger sister, Brianna Stockemer. “But it was his lie.”
“He lied a lot and Betty would give him lots of chances to make things right,” Brianna, 24, said.
“But he just kept lying and playing a lot of mental games. “It was a typical narcissistic relationship where you have a nice person who gives you a lot of chances.”
Connor Bowman alerted her family after she was hospitalized and later joined them at her bedside to comfort them during her final days.
The 30-year-old also insisted to Betty's family that she had HLH. The family had never heard of the disease but didn't think to ask questions.
“Betty was very healthy and had no medical problems,” her mother Nancy Sponsel, 64, told . “But we trusted him.”
Investigators allege Bowman slipped a fatal dose of the gout drug colchicine into her smoothie.
A grand jury in Olmsted County, Minnesota, handed down the indictment on January 5th.
Bowman is next due in court on Tuesday.
Sarah Leeser has set up a GoFundMe account to help Nancy and her family with legal fees, transportation to Rochester, memorial costs and other related expenses.