A number of mums have taken to social media to reveal they’re not giving their kids toys this Christmas, following in Drew Barrymore’s footsteps.
The actress revealed in a recent interview that she would rather give her two daughters – Olive, 10, and Frankie, 8 – “memories” than expensive gifts.
And it seems that Barrymore is among a number of parents across America who say they are cutting back on gifts for their children in favor of precious memories in order to divert their children’s focus away from consumption.
One such parent is Makenzy Smith, a 30-year-old Seattle photographer and mother of two, who explains her decision in a TikTok video that has been viewed more than 280,000 times.
“I don’t want them to think that Christmas is all about presents, so we don’t buy presents for Christmas,” says Makenzy.
“I want my kids to look back on their Christmases and I want them to think about their families around them, those wonderful magical meals together, the Christmas lights with me and my husband.
Seattle-based TikToker Makenzy Smith says she doesn’t give gifts for Christmas. She explains: “I don’t want to [my kids] to think that Christmas is all about presents, so we don’t buy presents for Christmas.
Instead of focusing on presents, Makenzy says she spends Christmas watching lots of Santa Claus movies with her children, ages two and four, and engaging in activities like drinking hot chocolate or visiting Kris Kringle
Drew Barrymore recently revealed in an interview that she would rather give her two daughters “memoirs” than expensive gifts
“I don’t want to deal with presents. I don’t like the pressure of getting everyone presents. I like getting gifts when I see something that reminds me of them.”
Instead of focusing on presents, Makenzy says she spends Christmas watching lots of Santa Claus movies with her children, ages two and four, and engaging in activities like drinking hot chocolate or visiting Kris Kringle.
She told that as a child she was always expecting presents until an incident completely changed her attitude.
Recalling the chain of events, she said: “Honestly, my parents gave me so much when I was younger that I expected gifts all the time and became the epitome of pampering.
I don’t want to raise spoiled kids who think every holiday is about them and a bunch of presents. That’s just not what I want to do
“They got separated and I think the gifts were kind of overcompensating, they just wanted me to be happy. But I vividly remember being about nine years old when my mother took me to the Salvation Army soup kitchen for Christmas.
“She asked me to get 10 of my toys to donate to the kids who were there and I fought with her. But when I got there and saw how small some children were, I asked them to go home. I then cleaned out all but a handful of my favorite toys and gave out garbage bags full of toys to little kids who were so grateful. I’ve never looked at Christmas like that.’
After posting her anti-toy Christmas video, Makenzy said she received a spate of negative comments from TikTokers, accusing her of being a bad mother and “harming” her children.
In response, she defended her stance in a follow-up video, saying, “It’s kind of an American consumerist idea that every holiday needs to focus on buying gifts and having gifts and needing things all the time.”
“I don’t want to raise spoiled kids who think every holiday is about them and a bunch of presents. That’s just not what I want to do.’
Missouri’s Shelley Jansen is another mom who’s going without toys this Christmas
In a TikTok video, Jansen explains how she will instead give her son an experience every month in 2023
Jansen’s homemade month-by-month calendar includes index cards for her son to read to see what adventures await him
The blonde revealed that her children have a small trash can with toys in their room and “they are fine with it” as they are more interesting to play outside.
She concluded, “My children have learned to entertain themselves and find things that interest them and to pursue hobbies and passions from an early age.”
While some people slammed Makenzy, other TikTokers praised her for spreading a positive message.
Laura Did It DIY wrote: “Good for you girls! I wish I had started what you do with my kids so long ago. You are exactly right!’
It’s sort of an American consumerist idea that every holiday needs to focus on buying gifts and having gifts and needing things all the time
And Ashley Baggs commented: “Perfect! Christmas is so depressing for so many because of the lack of money for presents. We need to focus on spending time with our loved ones.’
Missouri’s Shelley Jansen is another mom who’s forgoing toys this holiday season.
In a TikTok video, the blogger explains how she will instead give her son an experience every month in 2023.
Her homemade month-by-month calendar includes flashcards for her son to read to see what adventures await.
To demonstrate how it works, she shows the flashcards she made for her son that read, “We’re going to the National Transportation Museum!”, “We’re going to see real Choo-Choo trains,” “We’re going too.” see fancy cars.” , ‘You can choose something in the gift shop, ‘And then we’ll go eat something delicious.’
TikToker and blogger Stacia Daniels is another advocate for experiences over toys.
TikToker and blogger Stacia Daniels is another advocate for experiences over toys. In one post, some of the mother of a child’s meaningful gift suggestions include museum memberships, swimming lessons, aquarium memberships, swimming lessons or ballet lessons
For those who have less money to spend, UK-based TikToker, blogger, and mother-of-three Hannah Canavan suggests some low-cost and free ideas
In one post, some of the mother of a child’s meaningful gift suggestions “for all ages” include museum memberships, swimming lessons, aquarium memberships, swimming lessons, or ballet classes.
For those who have less money to spend, UK-based TikToker, blogger, and mother-of-three Hannah Canavan suggests some low-cost and free ideas.
She says this idea will mean a lot more to kids than toys, and they’re “great ways to spend time together, which is one of the most important things about Christmas!”.
You could write them a letter about all the things you’ve done this year, how proud you are of your accomplishments… That could be very special for a child
Some of their ideas include making paper crafts and decorating children’s rooms, “time stamps” that children can exchange for face-to-face time with their parents, and charity vouchers.
The Brit continues: “You could also write them a letter about all the things you’ve done this year, how proud you are of them, their achievements and obstacles they’ve been able to overcome this year. That could be something very special for a child.’
While moms seem determined with their opinions, a 2020 study led by a researcher at the University of Illinois at Chicago found that objects bring children more joy than experiences. The conclusion was drawn after four separate studies involving children between the ages of three and 17 years.
However, the authors note that the “effect changes over time.”
They continue: “As children grow older, the happiness they derive from experience increases to the point where older adolescents derive more happiness from experience than material goods, consistent with adult findings.”
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