Traditionally, men have dictated the course of a romantic encounter, but a new study suggests that may finally be changing.
Researchers in Kansas analyzed data from a survey of more than 20,000 straight college students describing their last date.
They found that only about a third of dates (36 percent) today involve the man asking the woman out, paying for it, and then initiating sex.
This is something of a “traditional” dating model, but it could be replaced by a more equal model between the sexes, where the woman initiates the sex and even pays for the dinner.
The researchers also found that women are more likely to have sex on a first date if they were the one who initiated the date.
Only 36 percent of dates involve the man asking the woman out, paying for it, and initiating sex, says a new University of Kansas study (file photo).
WHAT IS HOOKUP CULTURE?
Hook-up culture is a relatively recent cultural development in which people first have sex without traditional courtship.
Traditionally, before having sex, men would have agreed on a date, which was usually also paid for by the man.
This classic idea of dating as part of advertising was born in the 1920s, researchers say.
Modern “hook-up culture” — in which people engage in sex first without traditional courtship — is believed to have shattered dating norms that have existed since the 1920s, experts say.
“Hookup culture is a culture in which casual sex is part of the courtship process,” said study author Sam Kendrick of the University of Kansas.
“In the hookup culture, you don’t have to go on a date or be in a relationship to have sex. The order has essentially reversed.”
The classic idea of dating as part of advertising—where a date activity, like going to the movies, occurs before sex—was born in the 1920s.
Most scholarly research into young adult sexuality over the past 20 years has focused on dating — casual sexual encounters that don’t involve a traditional date.
“I feel like if sexual norms have changed so drastically, and they have, then the way that sex is initiated on date probably changed as well,” Kendrick said.
“People who delve into dating, however, often focus on what hasn’t changed.”
For the study, Kendrick and a colleague analyzed data from the Online College Social Life Survey collected between 2005 and 2011 from a sample of 24,131 students at 21 US higher education institutions.
In the traditional dating model, the man initiates the date and pays for the activity, e.g. B. dinner in a restaurant (archive image).
WOMEN WHO EXPLAIN LESS IN BED EXPECT LESS PLEASURE, STUDY FIND
It is already known that men in heterosexual relationships climax more often than women – a phenomenon known as the “orgasm gap”.
Now researchers in New Jersey have found that the phenomenon affects a woman’s desire to have an orgasm even in the bedroom.
The experts surveyed men and women in heterosexual relationships about sexual satisfaction, how often they orgasm and how often they plan to orgasm.
Not only did they find that the orgasm gap exists, but that women who climax less during sex have less desire and expectation to have an orgasm.
READ ALSO: Women Who Climax Less In Bed Expect Less Pleasure, Study Finds
Respondents described their most recent dates with someone with whom they were not in an exclusive relationship, including who initiated them, whether the man or woman paid, whether both paid, whether no money was spent, who made the sexual contact initiated, the extent of the sexual contact that took place and other information.
The researchers call a “dating script” a specific procedure that took place during a date.
Among dates that followed a male-initiated script, men paid for and initiated most of the sexual activity on approximately 36 percent of dates, the authors found.
In other words, more than 60 percent of hookups violate the traditional script in some way — defined as men demanding, paying for, and initiating sexual activity.
While the traditional dating script says that a man should ask a woman out and pay for it, 88 percent of respondents agreed that it’s okay for a woman to ask a man out.
However, of the appointments described in the study, 89.1 percent were initiated by men.
So this suggests that there is a disconnect between what college students say and what they do when it comes to date sexual activity.
The researchers also found that sexual activity was more “restricted” when men initiated dates than when women asked the man out — likely because the woman wanted the sexual encounter less.
Meanwhile, it was discovered that in an “alternative dating script” such as For example, sexual activity is more common among women who initiate the date.
“Genital contact” occurred in 63 percent of female-initiated dates, compared to 56 percent of male-initiated dates.
Of all dates involving sexual activity, 56 percent involved genital contact — a term that includes, but is not limited to, sexual intercourse.
Although men paid for the majority of male-initiated dates (68 percent), women contributed at least some payment to 17 percent of dates, and no money was spent on 15 percent of dates.
Overall, the study shows that men still initiate and pay for most dates, but the likelihood of genital contact increases when this traditional script is “violated.”
A limitation of the study is that the data only goes back to 2011, more than a decade ago, so behavior now could be very different.
A second wave of the Online College Social Life Survey is currently underway, which may provide a more up-to-date snapshot.
The authors also note that the data only contained information on heterosexual dates and much more research could be done on sex and dating in LGBTQ relationships.
The study was published in the journal Sexuality & Culture.
WOMEN WHO EARN MORE MONEY THAN PARTNERS HAVE TWO WAYS TO IMAGE ORGASMS
Psychologists have found that women who make more money than their male partner are twice as likely to fake an orgasm in the bedroom.
Men who earn less than their partner may have a “fragile masculinity” due to the long-held stereotype that men are the main earners.
As a result, women are thought to kindly try to ease men’s financial insecurity and boost their egos by faking orgasms during sex.
However, protecting their partner’s sense of masculinity “may come at their expense” because it stifles sexual satisfaction and honest communication, the psychologists said.
“Women put what they believe their partners need ahead of their own sexual needs and gratification,” said study author Professor Jessica Jordan, a psychologist at the University of South Florida.
“When society creates an impossible standard of masculinity to uphold, nobody wins.”
Read more: Women who make more money than their partner are TWICE as likely to fake orgasms