NBC
Before we were treated to the hosting debut of musician and actor Bad Bunny, Saturday Night Live kicked off with a cold open to the House’s third vote for speaker – which featured deeply unsympathetic Republican Rep. Jim Jordan, who has some serious issues, during during his time as an assistant wrestling coach at Ohio State University, emerged as the GOP candidate.
“I didn’t win, darling. Not this time either. I feel good. See you at home, sweetie. Bye,” Jordan (played by Mikey Day) mutters before breaking his phone.
“All I want to do is get Congress back to work so I can shut it down again!” he adds.
George Santos (a pouting Bowen Yang) strolls into his office carrying someone’s baby.
“Why do you have a baby?” asks Jordan.
“Nobody seems to know,” he replies, before turning to Jordan’s assistant, handing her the baby and saying, “Can you take this?” Just put it in an Uber.”
Then Santos says he has to leave because he just got a call from “Tupac.”
“Girl, I know. Jada is crazy!” Santos shouts into the phone.
Next, Jordan receives a call from Lauren Boebert (Chloe Fineman), who calls him from the theater during an Aladdin performance – while her date is fondling her breast.
Finally, there’s former President Donald Trump, who tells Jordan that he himself would run for Speaker of the House but is too busy doing a nationwide tour of the US court system.
“I do great things for the courts… do great things for the courts,” says Trump (James Austin Johnson).
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He continues: “I’m a weirdo. I’m a weirdo. what the hell am I doing here? They don’t play “Creep” live anymore. Did you notice that?”
The other day, the GOP dropped Jordan as its candidate for speaker after he embarrassingly lost a third round election.