The chaos surrounding the election of a new House speaker may be less than ideal for the nation, but it’s practically a gift to “Saturday Night Live,” which will explore the House Republicans’ political turmoil in an opening skit this weekend satirized.
The show began with Mikey Day playing Rep. Jim Jordan of Ohio, who lost a secret vote Friday to remain the Republican nominee for speaker after losing a third vote for the House position.
On the phone in his office, a seemingly calm Day said, “No, I didn’t win, honey. No, not this time either. It’s okay. I feel good.” After he ended the call, he broke the phone in two.
“Some of us are here to actually serve the American people,” Day said angrily. “All I want to do is get Congress back to work so I can shut it down again.”
An assistant (Heidi Gardner) offered him a new phone and introduced a visitor: Rep. George Santos (Bowen Yang), who was holding a baby.
When asked why he had the baby, Yang replied, “Nobody seems to know.” He handed it to Gardner and said, “Just put him in an Uber.”
Yang comforted Day and said, “I want you to know that I voted for you and, get this, so did Shoshanna Loggins.” Day asked, “Who is that?” Yang replied, “Me too.”
Day asked him if he should try running for speaker again. “Well, I’d be lying if I said yes,” Yang replied. “So yes.” He then answered a call on his cell phone that he said was from Tupac: “Girl, I know,” Yang said into his phone. “Jada is crazy.”
Day received a call from Rep. Lauren Boebert (Chloe Fineman), who offered her support while an offscreen hand reached out and groped her. “Are you out somewhere?” Day asked her. “Yes,” Fineman said, “I have to go. I’m at the theater watching Aladdin.”
Eventually, Day was visited in his office by former President Donald J. Trump (James Austin Johnson). “Yoo-hoo, is this the loser’s office?” Johnson asked as he knocked and entered.
“You supported me and then you kind of disappeared,” Day told him.
“Yeah, that’s because I prefer the Jordans that win, okay?” Johnson said. “Like the great Michael Jordan or the even greater Jordin Sparks. “No air,” remember that? That was a song. Tell me how to breathe without air? You can not. You can’t do it.”
Johnson boasted that he would be a great speaker himself if he weren’t otherwise busy. “Unfortunately, I will be too busy campaigning, traveling from city to city and visiting their beautiful courtrooms,” he said.
Day complained, “I did exactly what you would do. Intimidation. Threats. Why didn’t it work?”
Johnson replied, “Well, honestly, you’re not me, okay? You’re not kidding, I’m hilarious.”
Opening monologue of the week
Bad Bunny, the Puerto Rican pop star who served as both host and musical guest this weekend, continued a recent “SNL” tradition of Spanish-speaking hosts delivering part of their monologue in Spanish. As he spoke, a satirical caption appeared on the screen below him reading, “[SPEAKING IN NON-ENGLISH]” to tweak a (non-humorous) incident in which similar subtitles were shown at the 2023 Grammy Awards, when Bad Bunny performed and during his acceptance speech for Best Música Urbana Album.
“Please not again,” Bad Bunny said, and the caption beneath him changed to “[SPEAKING A SEXIER LANGUAGE]“.
Bad Bunny was joined as a surprise guest by Pedro Pascal, star of “The Mandalorian” and “The Last of Us,” who translated some of the host’s remarks into English and gave him advice on how to connect with the audience.
“Audiences love it when you show an embarrassing photo of yourself,” Pascal suggested, and a beefy photo of Bad Bunny appeared on the screen.
“I’m sorry, how embarrassing is this?” Pascal asked. “Because I forgot to get dressed,” Bad Bunny replied. (If that’s not enough Pascal content for you, he returned later that night for a skit reprising an earlier role as Marcello Hernández’s wryly judgmental mother.)
Filmed excerpt of the week
Even rarer on “SNL” was a segment titled “La Era del Descrubimento (The Age of Discovery),” which was presented entirely in Spanish.
It starred Bad Bunny as a 16th-century Spanish monarch, Hernández as his son, and Day and “SNL” alum Fred Armisen as explorers who have come to share the wonders of un nuevo mundo with their unimpressed rulers. A turkey is said to have “testicles on its face,” while the king and prince recoil at the sight of a pumpkin: “This melon has herpes!” they scream.
Celebrity Cameo of the Week
No disrespect to Pascal or Lady Gaga (who showed up to introduce Bad Bunny’s first musical performance), but we’ll give the nod to Rolling Stones lead singer and longtime pal of Lorne Michaels, Mick Jagger, who makes the latest in a long time series of ” SNL” appearances dating back to the late 1970s.
Jagger was a beast of burden in two sketches tonight: once with a fake mustache, playing a cackling character in a Spanish-language telenovela, and later as a lustful Lothario hiding out in a monastery. If his comedy career doesn’t work out, there’s always rock music.
Weekend Update Jokes of the Week
Over on the Weekend Update desk, hosts Colin Jost and Michael Che discussed President Biden’s diplomatic efforts during the Israel-Hamas war and Republicans’ difficulties in electing a new Speaker of the House.
Jost began:
Many people are calling this the highlight of his term, as President Biden gave several speeches this week in which he issued the same dire warning to anyone who was thinking about attacking Israel. And here was his message: [The screen showed a video montage of Biden saying, “Don’t. Don’t. Don’t.”] I wont. I really like that Biden only needs one word to make his point clear. He’s basically the Groot of presidents. But to give you an idea of how effective “Don’t” is, it’s the same thing Biden says to his dog right before it bites another Secret Service agent.
Even while in Israel, Biden said the Hamas attack was like “15 attacks on 9/11.” Okay, you can’t go somewhere to reassure people and then start evaluating things in 9/11 terms. This is not a calm scale. It would be as if your doctor gave you Ambien and said, “This will make you sleepier than 20 Cosbys.”
Che continued:
Jim Jordan, who describes here attacking the nipple, is no longer the candidate for speaker of the House of Representatives after the Republicans voted him out on Friday, which, by the way, he is used to because he was voted out many times as a child. Possible new candidates for speaker include Tom Emmer, Kevin Hern, Jack Bergman and six other candidates who are clearly George Santos. [The screen showed six images of George Santos in obvious disguises.]
Weekend Update Desk Segment of the Week
Capping off a highly quotable and often confusing promotional period for Jada Pinkett Smith’s new memoir Worthy, Ego Nwodim appeared at the Weekend Update desk to pose as the actress and on-again, off-again wife of Will Smith.
“I’m sorry if I seem a little tired,” Nwodim said to Che. “I was on the ‘Today’ show 14 times in three days.”
She shared what she believes is the secret to a successful marriage – “Never go to bed happy,” said Nwodim – and explained why she would never divorce her husband.
“Divorce is not an option,” Nwodim said, adding: “I have principles, Michael. If we divorced, he could fool around and end up happy.”