In a puzzling decision, Saturday Night Live decided this week not to open its first post-Oscars episode with the shocking physical assault on one of its most famous alums, but instead with another episode of Fox & Friends.
After some jokes about Donald Trump’s Truth Social App and Ted Cruz’s Antiracist Baby nonsense, the hosts were joined by Kenan Thompson’s Clarence Thomas, who would neither confirm nor deny that he nearly died from COVID-19, and Kate McKinnon’s Ginni Thomas, who spoke out against the controversy surrounding her lyrics to Mark Meadows on January 6, 2021.
“I don’t want any trouble,” she said. “I take my duty as Yoko Ono of the Supreme Court very seriously. All I want is a tidal wave of biblical vengeance to wash away the Biden crime family as far as Gitmo, and then we’ll release the Kraken!”
Next came Cecily Strong’s Jeanine Pirro, who was on “Wake Disney” and Rep Madison Cawthorn, who “had me in white supremacy” and “lost me in an orgy.”
They finally got to “The Slap” at the end of the sketch when James Austin called Johnson’s Trump from his bedside for his first weigh-in.
“You know, I watched Slap, I enjoyed Slap,” Trump said. “Hitch really impressed me. Quite an arm on hitch. I always knew Hitch had an arm. Back in Pursuit of Happyness, he tows the machine in and out of the subway. I loved it. You slept in the bathroom in the film. It’s so sad, so sad.”
“But it’s also a sad night for Hitch,” he continued. “That kind of behavior isn’t going to help Kevin James get a date with Allegra Cole, I can tell you that.”
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