Buemba! Buemba! Monkey Simão Urgent! The General Villain of the Republic!
Ready joke: Bolsonaro spent the New Year in miracles! It's a wonder he traveled via Milagres and not Papuda! It will be rare!
There is no miracle that can bring this mummy back to life. And a new country duo has just emerged with Milei and Bolsonaro: Milei and Milivrei! It will be rare!
And do you know how to wish a happy 2024 in Argentina? Happy 2020 on all fours! Two thousand and twenty out of four! Because with this milestone the Argentinians will spend the year as a foursome! Happy inflation year 2024! It will be rare!
And these storms in São Paulo are called Salles storms: They knock down around 80 trees!
And our reader Ciro Botelho sent his forecast for 2024: “You are not rich like Messi, the GDP is falling, your belly is getting bigger and your cock is getting soft!” It's not a prediction, it's a curse! It will be rare!
And the antiChristian local council? Councilor Rubinho Gomes, former MBL, wants to create Father Júlio Lancellotti's CPI! You want to do xrays at NGOs! At Sirio, Einstein or SUS? No SUSTO!
Worse still, anyone caught distributing food to homeless people without permission from City Hall will pay a fine of R$17,000! Three questions: 1) Who will supervise? 2) How do I pay the fine if I am caught giving food? Should I send the city council a Pix? It will be rare! 3) And where does the money go? To the office of the Antichrist!
And the Piauí Herald: “MBL wants to change the Bible so that Jesus no longer shares bread with the poor.” Otherwise you will face a fine! It will be rare!
And does São Paulo have a mayor? Yes, I saw it on TV one day: a wax man with a black beard! Like an extra from a Zé do Caixão film!
Notable facts of 2023: “Mijão and Maria do Pó, the most wanted criminals in the country”. “In revenge, a woman cuts off her husband’s penis, flushes the organ down the toilet and confesses to the crime in São Paulo.” Stupid! It will be rare!
And the sticker on the back window of a car: “Last day of cheese sale! I stopped by PMMG.” Better go back to the cheese! It will be rare!
We suffer, but we have fun!
That I'll drip my hallucinogenic eye drops!