The Agony Aunts has long written harsh truths in the pages of a magazine, but TikTok the generation is looking for a new brand aunt (and uncles) who understand the agony on social media, who are available to offer confirmation and reassurance, not strong love.
Instead of writing in his favorite columnist, Gen Z finds his agony aunts in podcasts, Instagram and TikTok. Often the advice is not given by a qualified therapist, but by an influencer who has carved a niche.
Their poster girl is an American TikTok user named Tinx, whose videos have been “liked” 80 million times.
Therapist Caroline Plummer told FEMAIL that while Generation Z is more likely to reveal their emotions than their predecessors, they still feel “uncomfortable” with their feelings, so they are afraid to open up to friends.
She added that young people can feel empowered by having high-ranking influential people who pay attention to their problems, and that consumers can get satisfaction immediately using their phone, in the same way they would do with a taxi or for at home instead of waiting for advice.
Meanwhile, Nadine Pfeiffer, founder and CEO of Little Nudge, said social media algorithms target users with similar views, which means they are more likely to turn to an influential person than to an objective third party. who may disagree with them.
She added that opinions that are constantly reinforced on social media may not benefit young people who are building “resilience to tackle differences and challenges” by engaging with those who have opposing views.
TikTok Tinx user, whose real name is Christina Nijar, has declared herself the “big sister” of the app and offers advice on everything from dating to style
With 1.5 million followers, the 30-year-old influential Tinx is considered one of the most famous agony aunts in the app. She is pictured appearing on the YouTube show Two Hot Takes
Nadine explained: “Given the algorithms of social media, the more you use social media, the more your feed will take care of you and the more you will feel understood and supported.
“This level of understanding is harder to find in the real world, as you will more often encounter antagonism or just opposing views.
“The latter is key to building tolerance and understanding of the world’s different views and lifestyles and building resilience to address differences and challenges.”
She says that as human beings it is natural to gravitate to those who will agree with us, but the ability to recognize and accept a number of points of view is beneficial in the long run.
“Of course, cognitive dissonance is a powerful force, so as human beings we tend to avoid and are either less likely to engage a lot with things and people who are different from us,” she said.
“So the algorithm-driven push on social media for things we ‘like’ reassures us temporarily and gives us temporary / receptive comfort, but it actually undermines our overall ability to recognize a wide range of perspectives and become resilient.”
She says that for young people who are confident, social media “reinforces the already high baseline of aspiration and motivation”, but for those who are less confident, immediate satisfaction with online therapy may eventually has a negative impact.
The YouTube channel Two Hot Takes, hosted by Morgan Absher, solves the problems of anonymous Reddit users, while reality star Nick Vial (right) gives advice on his podcast The Viall Files
“For those with low confidence, social media can provide temporary high well-being, but it actually undermines you in the long run,” she said.
“But social media acts like a drug, and like smoking, we continue to engage with it because it gives us temporary relief.”
The list of influential people, celebrities or podcasters who want to give advice is abundant, with several of them gaining a name for themselves or reviving a declining career by offering guidance.
With 1.5 million followers, 30-year-old influencer Tinks, whose real name is Christina Najar, has declared herself the “big sister” of the app and offers advice on everything from meetings to style.
YouTube hit Two Hot Takes sees Morgan and her team of co-hosts scouring the web for juicy anonymous dating inquiries for which they can give their advice
Reality star Nick Vial, 41, is best known for starring in The Bachelor after finishing second in two consecutive seasons of The Bachelorette, and is using his fame to rebrand himself as a romantic guru.
His tips podcast The Viall Files sees Nick calling listeners for their “Ask Nick Advice” segment as he explores all things dating and love with special weekly guests.
YouTube hit Two Hot Takes sees Morgan Absher and her team of co-hosts – including Tinx – clear the internet for juicy anonymous dating inquiries for which they can give their advice.
One of the most successful variations of the ‘girl talk’ brand is Call Her Daddy, a podcast for tips and comedy, created by Alexandra Cooper and Sofia Franklin in 2018.
One of the most successful variations of the “girl talk” brand is Call Her Daddy, a podcast for advice and comedy, created by Alexandra Cooper (pictured with the last guest Julia Fox) and Sofia Franklin in 2018.
In June 2021, it was announced that Cooper had signed an exclusive $ 60 million deal with Spotify, a podcast previously owned and distributed by Barstool Sports.
Caroline explained that because young people want to “recognize and acknowledge” emotions, they find it easier to connect online because of “the shame of revealing their deepest feelings.”
“Fortunately, today’s young people are also growing up in a world that is slowly encouraging us to recognize and acknowledge our emotions and deal with them in a healthy way,” she said.
As such, it makes sense that not only traditional therapy has gone online, but other forms of emotional support – such as SMS therapy and social media agony – are rising to prominence.
Reality star Nick, 41, is best known for starring in The Bachelor after finishing second in two consecutive seasons at The Bachelorette, while the 30-year-old influential Tinx has over one and a half million followers on TikTok
“Although there are improvements when it comes to normalizing strong emotions, there may still be embarrassment or even shame about revealing your deepest feelings, and these online options offer anonymity that traditional therapy or talking to friends just doesn’t. can provide. “
She added that in a post-pandemic world where access to therapy and counseling is becoming increasingly difficult, young people find solace in aunts experiencing agony online.
“It also offers a free way to get help in a society where access to mental health interventions can be very scarce or very expensive,” Caroline said.
“While social media can be a useful tool for solving a problem, it also creates its own problems when it comes to mental health.
“While young women today can access support for minutes on their phone, they are also exposed to endless images of perfectly filtered and photoshopped women, which can be extremely detrimental to their own self-image.
“As such, it is vital to educate today’s young people about both the benefits and the dangers of living online.”