A mother-of-two has shared how she lives like a full-fledged 1950s-style housewife and how her decision to quit the office was inspired by feeling neglected as a child.
Alexia Delarosa, 29, from San Diego, is part of a growing movement of so-called “tradwives” — short for traditional wives — whereby women live by old-fashioned gender stereotypes.
The California native, who stays at home to cook, clean and care for the kids while her husband goes to work, said she adopted the housewife mindset because her own mother wasn’t around enough when she was a child.
She explained: “My mother worked and also enjoyed spending time outside of our family home with friends. I’ve always wanted a more traditional model for my family. I loved the idea of a 1950’s style family life where the wife stays at home to take care of her husband and children and the husband works full time.
Alexia Delarosa, 29, from San Diego, is part of a growing movement of so-called “tradwives” — short for traditional wives — whereby women live by old-fashioned gender stereotypes
The California native said she adopted the housewife mindset because her own mother wasn’t around enough as a child
opinion poll
Do you think women belong in a tradwife role at home?
- Yes 81 votes
- No 35 votes
- Only if they want to live 221 votes
“I remember watching movies where the wives stayed at home to cook and clean for their husbands and I thought it was a romantic and sweet life. It really impressed me.”
While many women today are juggling work and childcare, Alexia believes more women will embrace the tradwife lifestyle when they realize they can’t have it all.
When she first started dating her husband Matthew, 37, she made sure they talked about the kind of family and life they wanted from the start.
Luckily their visions aligned and they both loved that Matthew was working full time and taking care of the finances while Alexia stayed at home and tending to various chores and future life.
Alexia recalls how things went from there: “When I became pregnant with our first son, Archer, now two, we decided very early on that I would stay at home with him.
“I had a home baking business that I did part-time, but when I got pregnant with our second son, Arlo, one, I really focused on taking care of the two boys, Matthew, and our home.
“I’ve always loved housework and was more than happy to take on this role.”
Today, Matthew owns and runs a coffee shop and works constantly, so Alexia makes sure everything is taken care of at home so he doesn’t have to worry or think about it.
Alexia with her husband Matthew and their two sons Archer (left) and Arlo (right)
Alexia continues to offer insights into her lifestyle as a housewife and posts regular updates on social media
She said: “Matthew has no duties that have been assigned to him. I take care of all the chores and make sure dinner is on the table when he finishes work.
“That’s when we eat together as a family. I’m pretty particular about the way things are, so I like it that way too.
“Matthew loves being at work and I love being at home and taking care of things. We both thrive in our roles and this arrangement works perfectly for us.”
According to Alexia, to make life as a tradwife work, it’s important to maintain a watertight routine.
As for an average day, she says: “Our family is very routine. I wake up between 5:30 and 6am to get ready before the kids wake up.
“As soon as they’re up around 6:30 am I make breakfast for the three of us and I love making things from scratch. Then I clean up and spend time playing around the house with the boys. Sometimes we take a trip to the coffee shop to see their father or go to the park, depending on what time they sleep.
“I then make lunch, they take a nap, and during that time I do some laundry and think about what we’re going to have for dinner.
“When I wake them up from their naps, we play around the house, I make dinner, go swimming, read their books and put the boys to bed at 7pm. Once they’re in bed, I do one last clean of the house so it won’t be broken when we wake up in the morning.”
Alexia continues to offer insights into her lifestyle as a housewife and posts regular updates on social media.
One of her latest Instagram videos shows her making butter herself, while another shows her whipping up cinnamon toast crunch for breakfast.
According to Alexia, to make life as a tradwife work, it’s important to maintain a watertight routine
The doting mum said: “I’ve always known there were things I wanted to do differently for my own family than when I was raised.”
Since posting about her traditional lifestyle, Alexia says she often receives negative comments from trolls.
To maximize time with her children, Alexia has decided to homeschool her boys
Since posting about her traditional lifestyle, Alexia says she often receives negative comments from trolls.
She revealed: “People like to comment to tell me that being a full-time mom and wife isn’t quite a job.
An antiquated trend or the key to a happy life? What is a “trading woman”
The term stands for “traditional wife” and describes a female housewife who adheres to traditional gender roles.
The term was born in 2018 after the movement spread on social media like Instagram and Youtube.
A tradwife refers to a housewife who loves nothing more than cleaning, preparing meals, and tidying up the house for her family while her husband is the household’s sole breadwinner.
It goes a step further than being a housewife, where the woman is responsible for the more traditional aspects of housework and childcare.
The term has been controversial as it has been associated with far-right rhetoric since some white, racist trad women emerged as Trump supporters in 2018
Source: Urban Dictionary and The New York Times
“Some people even tell me that I turn the clock back 50 years.
“But I don’t let that bother me because I know the work I do is invaluable and it would be so expensive if we had to pay someone else to fill that role while I go to work.”
“It’s so important to have a parent in the house who’s always there for the kids. I used to be a nanny and I was there for so many special and sweet moments with the kids I was the nanny for.
“They were such special times and I realized that I wanted to be there for all those moments when I had my own kids.”
To maximize time with her children, Alexia has decided to homeschool her boys. She also believes that this will help protect her from negative “external influences.”
Of the decision, she said, “There are so many… things that can happen to them while they’re not in my care. It really scares me.
“For example, Archer was at a party and was playing with some kids and when we were driving home he said, ‘You’re stupid,’ and we never say those words at home.
“It can happen so fast it’s scary so I want to be there to guide them and make sure they are raised the way we want them to be raised. We can stay in control until they’re older and judge characters for themselves.’
The doting mom sums up, “I always knew there were things I wanted to do differently for my own family than I did when I was raised.
“I didn’t want my kids to feel like they had to flee their homes and I wanted them to be able to count on their mother to always be there and always take care of everything. I wanted them to have a stable and predictable home life.
‘I couldn’t imagine our family any other way.’