While solo travel is gaining traction, some obstacles still keep some women from hitting the road alone. All our advice for newbies.
According to the travelers, the result seems to be unanimous. To try solo travel is to embrace it, so much is the experience of freedom total. Strolling through the cities, the countryside, being met… For some, walking alone is a matter of course, almost a kind of obligatory passage to follow your desires. But the clichés persist. Whether a woman can explore the world on her own without feeling intimidated or threatened always raises questions. In an ideal world, the question of safety – or insecurity – would not affect the willingness of some to venture out to sea. Leaving would not be a rebellious or brave act. It would be the simple manifestation of curiosity. We’re not there yet.
However, backpacking is a more feminine activity than you might think. In 2021, travel agency Tourlane, which specializes in tailor-made trips, said women had booked 54% of its structure’s solo trips over the past four years. The observation is clear: more and more women are taking to the streets. And why not you? Our tips for getting started.
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Learn from the experiences of other travelers
Nelly Bly, a journalist and frequent traveler, became a well-known figure in the United States and even had her face printed on postage stamps. Adobe Stock
For a long time, travel literature was primarily about male perspectives. Featuring intrepid explorers willing to take any risks to complete their expedition. However, there are numerous examples of female explorers: Nellie Bly (journalist who made a solo world tour in 72 days in 1889 and in passing beat the tour de force achieved by the famous Jules Verne character Phileas Fogg), Alexandra David-Néel (who was the first western woman to reach Lhassa, the capital of Tibet, in 1924) or, more recently, Sarah Marquis (adventurer who did not hesitate to travel through the most hostile regions on earth). As many journeys as Lucie Azema cites, women also travel in her book. Emancipation by Departure (ed. Flammarion, 2021). The journalist (1), herself a long-distance traveller, did a great deal of research for this book. “To read Many Traveling Women is to belittle the fact that they exist. This contributes to their representativeness,” the author explains to Figaro.
This women’s literature, which also makes it possible to address previously neglected issues, such as coping with the period in certain territories, but also the fear of aggression. These feedbacks are all tools that can help them overcome their fears. Thus, the blog Dare to travel alone and its variation in the Facebook group of the same name, both created by Mélanie Couillard, content creator on the web, help both those who have already started and those who have not yet dared. “I wanted to build a caring community. The women find themselves on different issues such as safety, the fear of being alone, organizing their trip or even the budget they will have”, introduces the founder. Other groups, like We are backpackers! on Facebook also offer to gather around an all-female community.
trust your instincts
“My personal rule is: would a man ask the same questions as me? If the answer is no, then you have to go,” says Lucie Azema. “Trusting yourself means bringing the journey into the realm of possibility,” the author continues. For some, this ability is not innate, it comes from a long journey. Traveling is one of the ways to acquire it. “We are rediscovering a sense of freedom. We get to know each other and do activities that suit us,” adds Mélanie Couillard.
Cultivating your instincts also means knowing how to perceive your future environment and the people who are there. A skill that, paradoxically, can be nurtured through preparation! For example, by collecting good information in advance, but also on site. “My bias is that there is no country more dangerous than the others. It is necessary to get acquainted with the habits and customs of a territory. In youth hostels, hotels or tourist offices you can find out which places you should not visit alone. Certain reflexes are also part of it, such as not having any valuable items with you,” explains the founder of Dare to travel alone, who was traveling alone in South America in particular.
Don’t be afraid of loneliness
Loneliness is by no means a fatality. Adobe Stock
It’s not always easy to find yourself. The fear of returning to your hotel room at night, eating at a restaurant, not being able to share what you discover with others… If loneliness is frightening, it is by no means inevitable. It can even become a travel companion, stimulating you to discover a little more about yourself and push yourself beyond your limits. To grasp them, Mélanie Couillard, like others, recommends the “method of small steps”. “Before, you have to try to go to a restaurant or to the cinema alone, and then go not far from home for a weekend. We go on and on and longer and longer. This is how you can know if you value solitude and letting go.
Sometimes it can be difficult. But contrary to what one might think, this loneliness is chosen rather than suffered, as Lucie Azema reminds us. “When we travel alone, people always come and talk to us.” There are many meeting places: guided tours, tourist activities, youth hostels or public transport. Do not hesitate to use social networks where groups allow travelers to discuss with each other but also to organize meetings. For example, the NomadSister site, formerly known as La Voyageuse, offers a 100% female couchsurfing formula. Travelers come into contact with hosts who have previously been validated by the platform. For those who want to leave as part of an organized trip, several agencies offer formulas reserved exclusively for single women.
Also read Voyage: a hosting platform for women only
go to another
It’s hard not to mention the issue of safety, so ingrained in the collective imagination. Always be careful, don’t let yourself become careless… The dictations are numerous, sometimes tiring. “Little girls are socialized through fear. We learn not to trust things anymore. If there is no longer a legal travel ban for women, restrictions will be imposed under the guise of benevolence,” analyzes Lucie Azema.
However, the journey feeds on the chance or organized encounters that can be made there. “For the sake of being different, but also for the sake of empathy, you have to leave room for the other. It also allows you to detach yourself from the idea that the other is a threat,” she continues. It’s not about evacuating the idea of bad meetings. They can happen. But they are more often the exception than the rule. For those who have tried, the solo adventure allows you to assert your instincts and gain confidence. And some tricks allow for nice encounters, like learning some vocabulary in the local language, but also off the beaten track if possible.
Free yourself from the looks of others
“The gaze and pressure of others can be difficult to manage,” observes Mélanie Couillard. Adobe Stock
“You are very brave”, “Isn’t it too dangerous?”, “And your children?”, “And your husband?” Itinerary. Because depending on the chosen travel destination, the reaction of those around you can put the brakes on certain longings. “The gaze and pressure of others can be difficult to handle. One woman told me she couldn’t afford to take time for herself. It’s sometimes very complicated to get rid of this logic,” decodes Mélanie Couillard.
She therefore notes that the profile of female travelers who seek her advice varies greatly between women aged 20-35 and women in early retirement. The interim period marked by motherhood for many is often a time of emptiness. “The character of the father who travels has always existed. We must explain to young women that abandonment does not prevent them from embracing their motherhood, ”points out Lucie Azema.
Don’t fall into the cult of achievement
There is no big or small journey. All that matters is what you want to achieve. “The dream part, but also the fantasy part, is important: it all starts here. You have to think up places,” stresses Lucie Azema. As such, Instagram has shaken practices… sometimes in the wrong direction. “It’s important to take a step back from your Instagram practice. Travel should be a place where you are much freer,” says the author. “Instagram, however, takes the notion of achievement. There are mistakes, that happens. Sometimes you get bored traveling and that’s okay.”
Also read How Instagram has changed our travel habits
Jump without looking back
Have you reached the end of the article? All you have to do is grab your bag and go!
(1) In October 2022 Lucie Azema published her second book: The use of tea, a sensitive story from the end of the world (ed. Flammarion, 2022).