It is widely believed that King Charles hated every moment of his five years in Gordonstoun – once called Colditz in kilts because of his Spartan regime.
Anyone who watches the second season of “The Crown” gets the impression that he was bullied there as a student and then frozen to the core (with ice-cold showers, no central heating and windows left open in the winter).
However, as we will see, this is a fictional embellishment of what actually happened when Charles was there from 1962 to 1967. In fact, in some ways Gordonstoun would prove what made him.
The early years of Charles' upbringing were reminiscent of the Victorian era. In fact, it's unlikely he would have noticed much of a difference if the clock had been set back a century.
After spending a month in a round wicker basket in his mother's dressing room, he was taken to the nursery in 1948. Princess Elizabeth had measles and was sent alone to Sandringham to recover.
Life lessons: Charles in Gordonstoun with Prince Philip and Captain Iain Tennant (right) from school
Prince Phillip decided that Charles should go on to Gordonstoun in Moray, Scotland, where he had been a foundation pupil
Ingrid Seward's book entitled “My Mother And I”.
From then on, Charles was cared for during his formative early years by two Scottish-born women: nanny Helen Lightbody and nanny Mabel Anderson, two working-class women who had a greater influence on his daily life than his parents.
While they taught Charles impeccable manners, they provided him with cuddles and a cocoon of security. They also insisted that, even as a baby, he should be treated with the respect due a future king.
Nursery servant John Gibson recalled that “Nana” Lightbody forced him to always refer to him as His Royal Highness: “There would have been real trouble if I had arrived at the nursery door with a tray and said “Here's Charles' breakfast” or “Here's Prince Charles' breakfast.” I had to remember to say, “I brought His Royal Highness's breakfast.”
When Charles was only seven years old, Helen Lightbody was abruptly “retired” – apparently because her long-standing disagreement with Prince Philip over how Charles should be raised (Philip thought she was spoiling Charles) was coming to a head. The little prince was desperate.
He never forgot her, remaining in touch throughout her life and inviting her to his inauguration as Prince of Wales in 1969 and to his 21st birthday celebrations. When she died in 1987, he sent an ornate wreath with a handwritten personal message to her funeral.
Luckily for Charles, Nanny Anderson, hired in her early 20s, was there for the duration.
The late Queen Elizabeth II and Charles, born November 14, 1948
After spending a month in a round wicker basket in his mother's dressing room, Charles was sent to kindergarten in 1948. Pictured with his mother, the late Queen Elizabeth II
As a young boy, Charles had a set routine and was brought to his mother every morning at nine o'clock
She is now in her late 90s and lives on the royal estate of Windsor in an elegant apartment that Charles paid for workers to furnish to her taste.
As a young boy he had an unfailing routine. He was brought to his mother every morning at nine o'clock, and when engagements permitted, she came to kindergarten in the evening. But that was the extent of it; Mother and son led largely separate lives.
The Queen's former private secretary, the late Martin Charteris, commented: “The Queen is not good at showing affection. 'She would always do her duty.'
She really had very little to do with Charles, he said. “He would drink with Mum for an hour after tea when she was in the country, but somehow even these contacts lacked warmth.”
“His father would be pretty grumpy about almost everything.” And neither of them were there very often.' By 1950s standards, Charles was extremely privileged. He had his own pony; He had flown from Scotland to London on a private plane and had his own carriage on the Royal Train. But his parents remained distant.
They kissed him goodnight but rarely hugged him. They disappeared for months on distant royal tours.
Because he was overprotected, he was not encouraged to befriend other boys. It was no wonder that Charles developed close relationships with the nannies and later with his governess, Miss Peebles, known as “Mipsy”: they were the most important women in his childhood.
At the age of eight, Charles was sent to Cheam School, his father's old prep school, in Hampshire. The queen remembered her son shuddering in fear on the way there.
For several nights he cried himself to sleep – quietly into his pillow, hoping no one would hear him. The memory still hurts, Charles said many years later, adding that it was one of the unhappiest times in his life.
At the age of eight, Charles was sent to Cheam School, his father's old prep school, in Hampshire
Upon his arrival at Cheam School, Charles cried himself to sleep for several nights – quietly into his pillow, hoping no one would hear him
He had never had to fend for himself, had never learned to assert himself, had never ridden the bus or been to a store, and knew nothing about money except that his mother's head was on the coins.
Additionally, he was uncoordinated and overweight, which may have contributed to his lack of success in games.
Cheam University maths teacher David Munir, who had been tasked with keeping an eye on him, remembered seeing Charles standing off to the side, confused and frightened. Plagued by shyness, he was forced to even try to make friends.
Desperate for comfort and security, he ran to kindergarten every time he returned from school – before even greeting his parents. He never confided to them the extent of his misfortune.
At school, Princess Anne recalled: “He wrote to Mipsy every day.” He was heartbroken. He used to cry in his letters and say, “I miss you.”'
The governess was equally disturbed by the absence of the little boy she had come to love. They corresponded until her death.
Her death in 1968 left Charles heartbroken. She had died in her apartment at Buckingham Palace and her body was not found until more than 48 hours later by a footman.
It was his father who decided that Charles should go to Gordonstoun in Moray, Scotland, where Philip had been one of his founding students. He felt his son would benefit from focusing on both physical and academic disciplines.
Another advantage was that it was less accessible to photographers and reporters than Eton. At this point, Charles hated being the center of attention; he just wanted to be like everyone else – although of course that was impossible.
After Prince Philip dropped Charles off at his new school, he joined the headmaster for lunch instead of driving away like the other parents. He was then chauffeured to Lossiemouth where he boarded a plane. He piloted it himself, lowering himself low over the school and waving his wings goodbye to his son as he flew away. Charles was ashamed.
Gordonstoun was not as tough as most reports suggest. Charles' home, Windmill Lodge, had central heating. The cold showers of the 1960s were never more than a brief bout and were always preceded by much longer, hotter showers. The early morning run was nothing more than a 45-yard dash up the road.
But it was still hard enough. My late husband Ross Benson, a former student who was in the same class and house as the Prince, recalled: “The “torture” as we knew it took place at 7.20 every morning unless it there was severe frost on the ground.
“Prince Charles came out with the rest of us in white shorts and trainers, stumbling and sleeping. Within minutes we were blue with cold. Afterwards we all rushed to the hot showers – we had to be quick because there were 60 guys and only 15 showers. Very often Charles stayed behind.
“Then he went out in his regular dressing gown and waited his turn.” “You had to take a cold shower after the hot shower and it was illegal to miss it, as some did.”
Charles, on the other hand, always took cold showers.
Looking back, it's hard not to feel sympathy for the royal newcomer. No one else in the school had a father who arrived by helicopter to see his son, as Philip did more than once. Poor Charles always looked like he was hoping the ground would swallow him up.
The late Queen Elizabeth II and young Charles in Windsor Great Park during a polo match in 1956
As Charles grew up, he lived a completely separate life from his mother, the Queen. The Queen's former private secretary, the late Martin Charteris, commented: “The Queen is not good at showing affection.” She would always do her duty.
But over the years, the strained relationship between the queen and her eldest son improved and a relationship of mutual love and respect developed
At rugby, the boys from the other houses who were due to play against his team that day were delighted at the idea of having a go with him. There was no personal malice involved – just the thought of pushing the future king into the dirt was irresistible.
Ross Benson – later a foreign correspondent for the Chron – said: “I remember a boy saying to me, 'I tackled Charles good and hard today.' It was in the middle of a muddy patch and I put his nose right in the dirt “But if his harsh treatment angered Charles, he never showed it openly or complained. Even when he broke his nose in a particularly tough game, he never “squeaked.”
Prince Philip was right: his son not only toughened up at Gordonstoun but also showed considerable courage. Despite the harassment on the rugby field, he continued playing until he left. And when it was his turn to strike, he never hesitated or showed any signs of fear.
One time, one of the older boys decided to tape record Prince Charles' snoring. While they waited for him to fall asleep, several boys crept to the open window of his dorm room and, using an extension cord, lowered the microphone to just above his head.
A little later that night, the conspirators listened with pleasure to the future king's loud snoring on their tape recorder. Unfortunately for her, Charles' caretaker caught wind of her joke and confiscated the tape.
On the whole, Charles remained cautious not to attract too much attention. When the school organized a dance to which 25 girls were invited, he spent the weekend with his grandmother at the Balmoral estate.
The girls stayed overnight and played tennis the next morning – but Charles did not appear again until long after they had left.
This gave rise to some speculation as Charles could have had as many girlfriends as he wanted. Even the maids of Gordonstoun stared and giggled when they saw him. They also had a penchant for stealing his underwear.
Over time, there were signs that Charles' relationship with his mother was improving. There was certainly no hiding his joy when the Queen visited him in Gordonstoun.
Benson recalled: “One time a special service was held in Michael Kirk, a tiny chapel. Charles had written to his mother inviting her to visit, and she came into the chapel with her son holding her arm.
“We were already in position before they entered, and no one could help but notice their joy at the reunion.” The Queen sat next to Charles and they whispered to each other quite often while playing the organ.
“Talking during the service is not allowed in the church, but of course we all pretended not to notice the rule violations.”
In his final year at Gordonstoun he played the lead in Macbeth, watched by both his parents. During one scene, he heard his father burst out laughing, but again managed to carry on anyway. He later asked his father why he laughed, and Philip replied, “That’s what it sounds like.”[ed] like The Goons.
Many years later, over tea at Highgrove, I asked Prince Charles about his time at Gordonstoun and added that I imagined it to be brutal. But he was quick to defend his alma mater.
“It wasn’t brutal,” he said. “Just easy.” It definitely gave me a great deal of independence and taught me a lot in that area, exactly what Eton did for William.”
Ultimately, there were few deficiencies in Charles' education, culminating in a second-class degree from Cambridge University. But there is no denying that his early life training was deficient in other ways as well.
Royal children were not raised to deal with personal problems. Instead of learning to deal with emotional situations, they tended to retreat behind the protection of their position.
For example, when Prince Andrew first met actress Koo Stark, he ended his relationship with his former girlfriend Christina Parker the following day.
Unwilling to deal with Christina, he ordered the Buckingham Palace switchboard to stop putting her calls through and never spoke to her again.
However, a marriage that begins to fail is a different matter and requires a willingness to embrace confused feelings. It is therefore not surprising that Charles was ill-equipped to deal with his often hysterical first wife.
In some ways this was a legacy of his terribly old-fashioned, upper-class upbringing. Deprived of crucial care from his parents, he never truly experienced the turbulence of normal family life.
The royal family never spoke about personal difficulties, and if one of them had a problem, he never discussed it. They usually only talked about small things and so unpleasant topics remained unanswered until it was too late.
“The Queen trained her emotions to avoid any confrontation,” former Tory statesman Douglas Hurd once said.
The sensitive prince longed for his mother's affection and retreated behind a mask of formality.
But people can change, even emotionally repressed royals. Over the years, the queen and her eldest son mended their strained relationship and it became one of mutual love and respect.
“The Queen loves Charles very much,” the Queen’s cousin, the late Margaret Rhodes, told me. “They care about each other even if they don’t show it.”
Ingrid Seward is editor-in-chief of Majesty magazine. Adapted from My Mother And I by Ingrid Seward, published by Simon & Schuster on February 15th, £25. © Ingrid Seward 2024. To order a copy for £21.25 (offer valid until 9/3/24; UK postage free on orders over £25), go to mailshop.co.uk/books or call 020 3176 2937 at.
Charles the Scottish nationalist
When the Gordonstoun boys took part in a mock election one year, they split into different factions.
To the astonishment of some, Prince Charles took on the role of a Scottish nationalist. He marched around the grounds in his own Stewart kilt, shouting: “Scotland forever!” and “Freedom for the Scots and down with the rule of Whitehall!”
He also held banners reading “Vote Scottish Nationalists” and gave forceful speeches in support of the party.
During one day he was harassed by a Tory supporter who reminded Charles that he was a Prince of Wales and not a Prince of Scotland. This left the prince stunned, but only for a moment.
He quickly recovered and shot back: 'Freedom for Wales too.' That's for the next election.'
“Can you borrow some milk?”
During his time at Gordonstoun, Charles once found that it was worth being different.
On a camping expedition with his detective Donald Green and some of the boys, one student, Alistair Dobson, was given the task of asking a local farmer if he could buy some milk.
Dobson knocked on the door of the only farmhouse in sight, nearly a mile away, only to be told there was no milk for sale. When he returned, ashamed, he admitted that he had failed.
Without saying a word, Charles himself went to the farmhouse. He later told Dobson what had happened.
“I knocked on the door, just like you,” said the prince. “The farmer came to the door and started insulting me for disturbing him again [said] he had no milk to sell. Suddenly he realized who I was and stopped mid-sentence.
“He blushed and went into a sort of strange blinking fit, and after muttering an apology he came back with two liters of milk, which I tried to pay for after thanking him profusely.”
“He looked completely taken aback and even his wife came to the front door to see me off.”
“My money was declined.” You see, there are some benefits to having your photo in the newspaper. People recognize you – useful when you need milk!'